The Filthy Ramblings of a Dirty Girl on Lock

This Shit Right Here!

2011-11-12T03:02:00.001-05:00

This shot of a dick in an ass with two fingers in a pussy looks like it would feel fucking explosive!!

Damn! Some Friday nite. Watching porn and shoving things in my ass...alone :-{

(had to remove link sorry!)

Mister Big Dick Willy BoBo

2011-11-10T14:40:00.001-05:00

Where are you?
Are you only in my dreams?
Oh, Mister Big Dick Willy BoBo.
Have you forsaken my sweet lips?
Upper or lower, does it really matter?
They both miss the feel of you...
In me, on me, by me, for me

Mister Big Dick Willy BoBo,
Won't you come over?
Should I click my clit three times and say:
There's no dick sweeter than yours
There's no dick sweeter than yours
There's no dick sweeter than yours

I'll be waiting...

Need Sex Bad!!!

2011-11-09T21:58:00.001-05:00

Almost had an opportunity to get me some ole skool dick yesterday and now I'm feenin like a dick junkie!!

Had staff development and one of my favorite bed fellows was only 15 mins away...but my principal unwittingly cock blocked my early escape by showing up on my escape route just as I was leaving! I knew there was a reason why I don't like this guy!

It's funny how so much thought went into this little afternoon tryst. I was going back and forth on the whole should I or shouldn't I with my marriage in such disarray...but I'm so horny, does that make me a bad person?

Sidebar: going through church now to fix what's broke as a last ditch effort.

So, is it wrong to want to sleep with someone else while deciding whether you want to remain with your spouse or not?

What say you?

Happy Halloween Bitches!!!!

2011-10-30T21:55:00.001-04:00

The Queen of Fucking Broken Ass Hearts!!!

Pre-Halloween Cheeks

2011-10-23T21:31:00.001-04:00

Halloween is helping to cheer me up, so I thought I'd cheer you all up too!

Happy Early Halloween!

2 Weeks. Confused Like a Mother Fucker!

2011-10-15T20:44:00.001-04:00

Don't know what I'm going to do with my life and marriage but I'm so confused and horny.

Is it horrible that despite the shit that's going on in my life, I still wanna fuck?!

Maybe that's my coping mechanism but I find myself unreasonably horny right now!

The beginning of the end...

2011-09-30T22:55:00.001-04:00

This is what I sent my best friend last night:

"Please tell me I can call you in about an hour after kids are asleep. The police just left here after David threw a box at me, slammed me against the armoire and threw me on Links bed. Filed report and they asked him to sleep somewhre else tonite."

I have since filed an Order of Protection, and at approximately 7pm he was served by the Sheriff. I have a court date on Tuesday. Never thought I'd be living a real life Lifetime movie of the week. I just know I will not be anyone's statistic.

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Husbandly Affirmations

2011-09-24T10:33:00.001-04:00

After toe curling sex this morning I broke down crying. Hubby asked what was wrong. And it hit me: I was scared. I didn't want to lose him. I realized why I didn't have much of a reaction while reading those emails, it never occurred to me that someone else could take him away from me until that moment.

While legs were still intertwined, a sheen of after sex sweat covered us both, and tears ran down my cheeks, he said:

"I'm not going anywhere...
No one is going to ever take me away from you...
The longer I'm with you, the more beautiful and sexy you get...
All the times you wanted me gone and I never left should tell you I'm committed to you and only you...
I love you and I never have and never will cheat on you...
I promise."

Admission of Guilt or Reassurance?

2011-09-22T06:21:00.001-04:00

I Think My Husband Cheated On Me

2011-09-20T18:35:00.003-04:00

The jury is still out. I found some emails of conversations between my husband and some chick from his old job. I wasn't being sneaky I had permission to use him email to send out resumes on his behalf and clean up his 5000+ full inbox (I'd been teasing him for years that I would do it, and he practically begged me to do it).

Anyway I found these emails from back in 2006 after we'd been married a few months and about to get our house. Long story short there were a lot of emails with her cursing him out about not being there for her and terms like "you got what you wanted from me", "I know we each have our significant others but", "I know I shouldn't have gotten feelings for you", "Don't worry about canceling on me %$@^@, I made other plans"...it was over the course of 6 emails and they were very long or I would've posted them.

I did, however, forward them all over to my best man friend for a MANpinion. His assessment was that the girl was fucking crazy. And she did sound like a nutjob constantly going off on him for a variety of infractions, mostly not spending time with him.

When I first read them on Saturday, I wasn't angry nor was I hurt, I just felt sick to my stomach. I didn't have any rage, and therefore just sat on this information for 2 days before finally deciding to ask him about. Mind you, I let him know on Saturday that I did clean out his inbox and that he should "really check what I left, in case there was anything important".

Of course, he didn't catch the hint, and I asked him last night who the chick was. Without hesitation, his eyes bugged out of his head, and he said, "That bitch is fucking crazy!" He went on to explain that she was a friend from his old job that he used to go to lunch with on occasion but then she started "catching feelings" and acting awkward, so he told he couldn't be friends with her anymore. "PERIOD". I questioned him a little more about some of the wording, and just as my friend told me, hubby explained that if I "read carefully" I would have seen the outlandish commentary came from her not him.

He hugged me and kissed me, and told me he felt terrible that I would even think that, and that he loved me more than words can say. He apologized for me feeling cheated on but not to fear that he would never ever cheat on me.

I'm trying to figure out if my lack of anger or hurt is because I believe him or if maybe I'm in shock still at the thought. I really don't know what to think and while we're in a really good place now, we weren't back in 2006. I could say that at the end of the day he trusts me implicitly because I had and now have full access to his email and cellphone (all passwords), and he is not computer savvy on the tricks of hiding anything computer related. Soooooo.....

*Sigh*

Oh, dirty birds, where art thou?

2011-09-14T21:05:00.001-04:00

I'm getting cursed out left and right for not updating the nasty girl in me. Honestly, I don't know where she is! Am I sexin' it up with the hubby. Uh huh! Buuuuuut...my vagina is still not sexy.

My surgery was back in June, and hubby just finally went down on me this past weekend. I have not masturbated yet since the surgery...I KNOW!!! Me? Not pleasure myself?!?! WTF, right?

And I think that's why I haven't been doing the sexy blogging thing. I spend a lot of time touching my 6" scar. Some of it has no real sensation. I really just miss my old vagina.

My husband swears everything is fine, but most times after sex, the scar aches and throbs, but not in a good way.

Plus, part of me wonders if it's a side effect of the Cymbalta I'm taking. I haven't gone out of my way to initiate sex...imagine that? But once we get it on, the sex is great! Then once it's over, I'm good. I haven't asked for seconds in a minute!! (sure hubby's happy bout that!)

That is where I'm at. Sorry to disappoint, I'm hoping the throw on some filthy posts really soon (I know I keep saying that...don't give up on me, ok?)

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My Birthday Cleavage!!

2011-08-12T18:28:00.001-04:00

HAPPY SPARKLY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!

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HNT - 1 + 1 = Boing!

2011-07-21T21:41:00.004-04:00

(if you look real close to the left lip, you can almost see the missing link LOL)

Still got these results

HHNT EVERYBODY!

GO OUT AND FUCK SOMEBODY!!

Pussy Revealed

2011-07-13T15:39:00.001-04:00

Here she is in all her scarred glory. I figured why start holding back now. I've shared all the good and the bad up to this point, right?

So without further hesitation...

This is a shot of the scar (it's the hairless portion of my lip)

Here's a close-up of why I'm still suffering, because of the incision location the wound just will not close. (hasn't stopped me from fucking though :-D) and the lower lip is still very much swollen.

Sigh. My poor vajajay.

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What Sexy Names Do We Have For Body Parts?

2011-06-24T20:38:00.001-04:00

This one goes out to my girl and work partner:

She hates the word "Pussy", what other words can we give her for her naughty parts?

And what names do you all have for your nasty guy and girl parts?

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Question: First Time Sex?

2011-06-24T06:00:00.001-04:00

From a good friend:

Been seeing this guy for 2 mos. 3 dates, 2 sleep overs and NO sex!

Is it ok for women to initiate "first time sex"? Subsequent sex yes, but sex for the 1st time? I'm getting mixed reviews and I say no.

Ok bloggers, what say you?! Let's help her out!

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I HAD SEX!!!

2011-06-19T20:50:00.004-04:00

After 3 months of pain and suffering, lack of mojo and surgery, impatience and depression...I finally felt somewhat sexy enough to have some sweet, sweet loving from hubby. He has been trying really hard to make me believe that all is well with my vajajay and my overall sexiness.

Trying to get a good angle of my current state of vagina to show you all soon! But....

I'MMMMMMMMMM BACCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!

My VaJayJay is Deformed

2011-06-05T08:59:00.001-04:00

Ok guys, here are some reasons why I've been MIA:
1. Been depressed for a while
2. Finally on Cymbalta and going back to solo therapy. Combo seems to be working
3. Haven't had sex in about 2 1/2 months.
4. Had a series of infections which doctors just say some women are more susceptible to get, ugh
5. Then I just had surgery to have my recurring sebaceous cysts removed from my coochie area
6. The incision is 6 inches long and there is a huge chunk of my vajayjay missing.

I'm still recovering. I spend a lot of time with my legs sprawled open not in a sexy way either. Even yesterday, I had to get out because it was so nice. So we pulled out the wheelchair from when I was preggers and went to a fair. Under any other circumstance it would have been sexy going out commando. However, not so much when it actually looks like a bomb went off between my legs.

Hubby's exact words were "I think that's the worst thing I've ever seen!" I thought about posting pics but ...I don't know. You guys have seen everything else right?

Well, I've definitely lost my mojo after the meds were actually working to bring it back. Sigh.

If you want to weigh in on how bad it looks let me know.

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150 FOLLOWERS!!

2011-05-30T15:29:00.002-04:00

EVEN THOUGH I'VE BEEN AWAY DEALING WITH LIFE AND TRYING TO REFOCUS MY ENERGY ON FIXING THE INNER ME...I'M SO HAPPY TO SEE THAT I'VE GOTTEN 150 FOLLOWERS!

THANKS GUYS!!

HOPE TO HIT YOU WITH THE NEW NASTY ME...AND MY JOURNEY IN A FEW...PLEASE BE PATIENT!

LOVE YA!!

Feeling Cheeky

2011-04-25T14:19:00.001-04:00

Looking like a big black peach... Anyone care to take a bite?

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Ass (by request)

2011-04-25T00:34:00.001-04:00

Left cheek...

Right cheek...

Both...

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HNT - Real Skin Party Pics...Kinda Cheered Me Up a Bit

2011-04-21T20:48:00.004-04:00

Photos by EricG

Thoughts?

My Apologies...

2011-04-19T14:14:00.001-04:00

Hope you guys didn't mind my rant. If so, here's a token of my appreciation

Still crying, but have to find something to cheer me up, right? I looked good last weekend...

...thereishopethereishopethereishopethereishope!!!!

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FUCK

2011-04-19T11:47:00.001-04:00

Motherfuckingcocksuckingassholemotherofawhorebastardassselfishprickpissingmeofftonoendmakingmecomfortableonlytoconfusethefuckoutofmeastowhethericankeepupthisbackandforthhappydepressedbullshitofamarriageineedafuckingbreakorimgoingtofuckingpostalonhisfuckingignorantass...

...thought that would make me feel better but it didn't. Tired of my yoyo marriage? Me too, spend a fucking week in my shoes. Two steps forward and fifty steps back.

I'm starting my own therapy tomorrow. Maybe it is all me. Maybe I am the problem.

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Museum of Sex, Dinner, and First Skin Party Equals...

2011-04-10T18:41:00.004-04:00

...Hot make out session at Skin Party

...extremely hot photo shoot at Skin Party

...being thrown into a NYC driveway and tongued down with a hand up my skirt

...a blow job for him while driving

...a hand job for me while driving

...stopping on the side of a deserted NYC street to make out in the car

...fucking in front of our house in the car with me on top and the car door open

...having crazy ripped up fishnet stocking sex till the wee hours of the morning

That's how I plan a date night! Let's see if this inspires more creativity from him. He was very pleased with my aggressive behavior.

Fucked him good...

2011-04-03T09:58:00.002-04:00

...now I'm getting breakfast in bed! That's how you do it!

Although, he fucked me so hard I'm practically in traction! My back is all fucked up!

But alas the pussy is smiling!

I'm trying to approach my marriage the same way I approached my last pregnancy... Before I got pregnant, I started acting and treating my body as if I was already preggers. Now I'm trying to act as if my marriage is well and it's just the way I want it already.

Basically, I'm being a whole lot more positive which is one of the things he asked of me: appreciate the small things and be patient for the big things.

We'll see!

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Where Do I Rank?

2011-04-03T09:34:00.001-04:00

This morning hubby asked the question, "where do I rank with all of your past lovers?"

I thought long and hard about how to correctly and politically answer this question.

I told him that the things I've asked him to work on (spontaneity, variety, open-mindedness) are what puts others before him, but that our actual sex is pretty good.

Did I answer the question best? How would you or have you answered this type of question?

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2011 Sexual Bucket List

2011-03-02T10:26:00.004-05:00

More from couple's home therapy (we have yet to discuss sex with the new therapist)

...here's this year's updated Sexual Bucket List: (basically all the different places and ways I'd like to have sex)

Elevator
plane
Sex party
3some for me
3some for him
waterfall
open meadow
subway
in the rain
blow up doll
on a bar during happy hour
in my school - on my desk or in my classroom
in a firehouse
roped and gagged
latex'd

I'm sure I'm missing some but wanted to get the list out before Hubby wakes up to go to work.

3some Debate

2011-02-28T22:19:00.005-05:00

Hubby and I have been having some really lengthy conversations about my wants and desires, and I continue to shock and astound him at the things that would make and keep me satisfied in the bedroom. Suffice it to say that my 3some fantasy has pretty much consumed every one of these discussions.

He is under the belief that if he were to ever give in to my request that:

He would be emasculated
I wouldn't be satisfied with just one time
I would look at him differently
He would never look at me the same

To #2 I came back with, " Isn't it better to have fucked, than never to have fucked at all? At least I can say that my fantasy was fulfilled and it was fulfilled with my husband, as opposed to still aching for it in my old age."

I'm curious, how many of you have engaged in the a 3some while in a serious relationship (either guy-guy-girl or girl-girl-guy)? How did it work for you? Were there any ramifications? Any regrets? Was it only one time or multiple? Did you enjoy it?

Please put some of my fantasy into real life perspective. Thanks.

Happy HNT: Anybody need a REF??

2011-02-25T16:01:00.004-05:00

This was my V-Day gift to hubby. Matching Referee outfits. We got a night off from the kids so we put them on, played a foreplay card game, and he got me totally drunk on a bottle of Nuvo. It was great. This morning I got breakfast made, and the opportunity to do school work while he cleaned house. I am so enjoying his making up to me!!

Details soon cum!

Holy Hot Shit Review: Sex Therapy

2011-02-14T21:17:00.005-05:00

Got myself this lovely little number and was planning on having some fun solo time in my car when hubby decided he would break my "NO SEX DURING THERAPY" rule. Why did I the sex addict make such a ridiculous request? Few reasons:

1. Sex is the bandaid to the broken arm...get it? Temporary fix

2. By insisting on such a ridiculous rule, maybe he would do the opposite

3. I didn't want it to sway my feelings of anger that I felt entitled to!

Anyhoo, back to my using my new toy from the Adult Toy Shoppe! I came home on Friday and he decided to share his solo therapy session where he talked about our intimacy issues and lack thereof. Gasp! I couldn't believe it. After a long discussion of his wanting to know what needs did I feel he was not taking care of. In a nutshell, I told him that he's a selfish lover. That he always has to have a happy ending for himself, that he's never been the type of lover to just give me head and walk away, or give me hand job and leave me breathless.

After that I went to take a shower, he decided to join me. Boring. He literally just joined me in taking a shower. Nice. But now what I was looking for. Then he proceeded to go down on me for an entire hour!! That was record breaking for him, he usually just made me cum once and then he's enter me. Don't get me wrong. It was like Pussy Eating 101. I was giving tutorials the majority of the time.

He has to work on not using his entire lower half of his face to eat me out. Very irritating is his beard. Well, when he was getting ready to enter to me, I put the brakes on. "You have to masturbate in front of me first, if you want to fuck me." That threw him for a loop, but he agreed. Big things happening here folks!!

He got his dick oil out and I got my handy dandy Pocket Rocket Vibrator Travel Kit! I watched him stroke his dick with half lids as I used the middle attachment to get myself off. It was a delightful feeling. I held the little studded end on to my clit and worked it up and down my clit to the outskirts of my pussy walls. I was moaning and cumming as he jacked off squeezing my tits and watching me. He begged to gain access to my forbidden walls, and it wasn't until I had an orgasm so hard from the buzzing, the squeezing, the watching, the breathing that I forgot all about my damn rule and decided I deserved to be fucked proper. And I was...

...for 3 more hours!! I was exhausted, depleted, dehydrated, and almost needed a ambulance after hyperventilating! Imagine if the doctor asked "what brings your wife to the ER at 3am?"..."UM, I tried giving her sex therapy and it nearly killed her!"

Let his ass keep trying to kill me in the bed...thanks to my toy, I can now have flashbacks when I'm playing with myself in my car, work, the mall, doctor's office.

Rihanna - S&M

2011-02-14T21:11:00.001-05:00

I MAY BE BAD...BUT I'M PERFECTLY GOOD AT IT!!!

Got my EXHALE on in Atlantic City!!

2011-02-06T15:01:00.004-05:00

Went away last weekend (i.e. the Fuck Me shower scene HNT) to get away from the hubby and left him in charge of the kids. It was great! I got to gamble a little, got a spa treatment, ate some really fantastic food, and drank even better booze. I went with my cousins and they indulged my blogger tendencies with the following pics!

I even have some guest HNTs! Enjoy! I had a blast taking them!! There were wall to wall windows in our suite and of course I just had to strut around in front of them bucked ass naked in hopes that someone was jerking off at the sight of me!!

Crazy delicious fantasies ensued, and my lost mojo returned so hard I had to fight the urge to masturbate while they slept!!

What I Need...

2011-01-29T10:30:00.001-05:00

Can you see what I need?

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This is how you do it HNT!

2011-01-22T22:08:00.001-05:00

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Shocking Update!

2011-01-21T05:29:00.001-05:00

He's going to individual counseling! What miracle caused this to happen, you say?

I sent him the following text message after he screamed at our daughter causing our last big blowout shortly following our marriage counseling:

"Honestly I think we should take some time apart while we go through therapy. I can't keep this up.
Maybe you should stay at your folks for a while!"

Hours later I got a lengthy apology and praise for wanting to protect our children even from him. That he finally sees how hurtful he's been.

I'm mildly hopeful. I'll believe it when he starts his own course to self-reflection.

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My Therapy Theme Song!

2011-01-18T22:01:00.004-05:00

I hate going to new therapists! You have to start all over, rehash old shit, before you can get to the new shit, all the background information....When I want is for him to fucking LISTEN!!

This is our 4th, shit, maybe 5th attempt at fixing our marriage. He swears he bends to my every will and has no say. I say he's still living on single island and he doesn't give a shit about what I say. I say he talks and treats the kids like shit. He says he was raised where a child is to be seen and not heard...the list goes on and on.

But I think this will honestly be my last attempt. It's be 5 years of the same exhausting fights, but I will not stand by and what him be a tyrant to my kids. Even today he screamed at our 10 year old as she was trying to be cute in asking him to attend her school recital...but because she was asking in a roundabout 10 year old he said, "Don't ever ask me any stupid questions! That was a stupid question and I will not entertain such nonsense!" After whisper fighting for 10 minutes I got him to apologize to her...why do I have to keep doing that?

I'm looking into signing him up for some type of sensitivity training or counseling and add that to the ultimatum list...and by the by I did not wake his whack ass up for sex last night and he woke up all pissed off. OH-FUCKING-WELL!!

I know y'all want some T-N-A and once I get out of this marital fucking funk, I will get back to it. Just bare with me while I bare with his fucking ass.

Thanks.

You've Heard of Extreme Fighting...Well, Here's Extreme Fucking!!

2011-01-17T20:46:00.005-05:00

Now this is VARIETY!!!

Hubby wants sex tonight...wanna know how he asked?

"Hey, so you got the all clear from your doctor, right? How bout you wake me up when the kids are asleep. I'm going to take a shower, ok?"

No comment.

Texting An Old Flame

2011-01-09T21:20:00.004-05:00

*Sigh*

I have an itch my husband can't scratch and I may have started on a very, very slippery slope.

My ex has been on my mind a lot, and I mean, if I close my eyes just to take a breath images and sensations of him flood my senses. I need that complete sensory overload of knowing that someone gives a total shit about you. Unbridled passion and compassion.

*sigh*

So I texted him.

Long story way short: I asked him if he wanted to see me.

He's seeing someone, but said that he would never tell me "no".

Now...what?

Oh, No The Fuck He Didn't!!

2011-01-09T19:33:00.004-05:00

I'm washing our son up in the shower, Sunday night is shower night and I wash his hair and we have a blast, right? Or so I thought.

Anyone who has kids knows sometimes they're ok with water on the face and sometimes they're not. The trick is to have quick distractions. I get to washing my son's hair and he likes to help but sometimes he forgets he has soap on his hands and will rub his eyes, he'll cry for a second while I rinse out the Johnson's then I get to the art form of distraction. Tonight was "Who do you love?" where I ask him about all the people (animals) that he loves.

We get through maybe 2 rubs of the eyes, I start to rinse his hair out, and tonight he decided he didn't like the water and did his cry thing. However, before I could continue the love quest, Mr. Asshole bursts into the bathroom screaming, "WHY ARE YOU TORTURING MY SON?! GOT HIM IN HERE EVERY NIGHT CRYING!" WTF!

It's winter idiot, he doesn't get a bath every night, but I'll play along, however, his outburst now sends our son's minor whimper into a full fledged meltdown!

I try to calmly explain that I know what I'm doing, our toddler is fine, he's making matters worse, and now letting the cold from the hallway into the bathroom. Do you know he had the nerve to say some shit like "But when I wash him up he doesn't cry!"?

First, let me remind everyone including him that the last time he gave our son a bath was about a year ago, OK?! So he is far from a fucking expert on bath time! He wants to now make this a good time to tell ME that I must be doing something wrong. I basically said, "Hey, if you think you can do a better job of not only giving our 2 year old a bath, but wash his very temperamental hair too, KNOCK YOURSELF OUT! If not, get out of the doorway, our son is getting cold!!"

Strange, he didn't decide to show me how it's done though! After, as I'm trying to get him dressed for bed, Ding Dong continues his rant about he should be able to have a say if he doesn't like how I'm handling his son. Really?! You would have a say if you lifted one fucking finger to take care of our son! I told him that him running into the bathroom to correct my bathtime routine would be as asinine as me running into the garage and telling him he's fixing his car wrong.

My list for therapy is getting longer and longer...

2011-01-04T22:18:00.004-05:00

Can toddlers sense when something is wrong with mommy and daddy? It took everything I had not to burst into tears after this happened today. It's not like we're not talking or even fighting right now, but still...

As I'm carrying my son to take his bath we cross paths with hubby and this is the dialogue that ensued:

Son: Daddy shum here (he then puts one arm around my neck and one around daddy's neck

Hubby: Yes

Son: (looks at Daddy) Daddy an' Mommy (looks at me) frenz

Confused Daddy look

Me: Daddy and mommy are friends

Son: Yes, Mommy. (Looking at daddy) Daddy shuddle wif Mommy

Me: He wants you to cuddle with me

Son: *sigh* yes mommy (as if he was frustrated that I'm translating). Daddy you shuddle mommy right now. Daddy an' Mommy frenz.

Hubby: Ok, I'm friends with mommy. We'll cuddle later.

Son: Good job, daddy, good job!

We have an appointment with a new therapist on Tuesday next week. I have to work on my list of issues so I don't get frustrated in session and not get everything out.

Happy Pity Party, I Mean, New Year!

2011-01-02T19:59:00.001-05:00

My husband is back in asshole mode. He's been there for quite some time now. Let's count the ways:
1. Ignored our son the day after missing his birthday to play video games
2. Bought a brand fucking new 55" flat screen TV for himself for Christmas but we can't pay this months mortgage because HE deserves it.
3. Had me get a family friendly game for all of us for Christmas and has been promising our daughter all week that we'd play together but what is he doing instead right now while I type this? Playing his fucking game with his online buddies.
4. Has told me in so many words when I say I'm unhappy with the state of our marriage and how he treats myself and the kids - "you'll get over it".
5. We're supposed to start back at therapy but part of me really wants to know what's the point? It's been five years and I don't know how much more of him emotionally hurting me and the kids that I can stand.

I am just so unhappy when I come home knowing he's there. I find myself being thrilled when he decides to take double night shifts or just sleep at work.

When I tell him that our daughter now tells me that "Daddy cares more about his video games than he does me". He just says that shes supersensitive and he's working on it. How is a 10 year old supposed to get that?

It is taking every ounce of willpower in me every day not to take that fucking PS3 and drive my car over it about a hundred times.

Sorry for the pity party and it's only the 2nd day of the year.

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MERRY HNT EVERYBODY!!!

2010-12-24T01:07:00.003-05:00

"Oh, Santa! I thought I was supposed to be the naughty one!!"

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

The Freak In Me Is Dying to Get Fucked!!! Happy HNT!!

2010-12-15T21:55:00.001-05:00

Damn, I really want some rough sex! And this song came to mind. When this song came out I was in college and at the height of my freakiness! I was just fucking dudes and tossing them when I was finished with them. I had a bit of a reputation for not playing around in the bedroom, guys used to say, "If you don't know how to put it, don't even bother fucking with her cuz she WILL kick you out her bed!!"

Sigh...I miss those days!

Rori's 12 [Naughty] Days of Christmas 2010!

2010-12-14T21:47:00.002-05:00

Rori is the fucking shit!! Take a naughty peek at what she's got going on her filthy list (so mad she beat me to the idea LOL, love ya Rori!)

Just to give you a hint at what going on Between My Sheets, here are the days we've seen so far (and just an FYI a certain someone {ME} is featured on some of this naughty list:

You'll have to check with Rori for the rest of the list!! Try to guess which ones I'm on ;-)

Holy Hot Shit Review!!!

2010-11-29T21:51:00.001-05:00

I have been neglecting some of my filthy blogger duties, my apologies! It's been a rough few weeks with the coochinator! She is seriously out of commission, but that didn't stop me from testing this bad boy out!

Isn't it fucking cute with its purple self?! Listen to me when I tell you that this G-Rock Pleasurizer has its name for a fucking reason: It will pleasurize the shit out of your clit and your g-spot.

First of all, it fits like a glove - slides right on in. The silicone is so soft and supple it feels like real skin. I decided to do exactly what The Adult Toy Shoppe suggested: "This vibe can be worn around the house while doing your chores, or before intercourse for a sweet preparation!"

HOW SWEET IT IS HONEY! I barely made it the six feet from my bedroom to the kitchen before I had to hold on to the washing machine for the first orgasm. (Thankfully kiddies were playing unbeknownst in the living room) Then I "tried" to sweep up the kitchen, who told me to be so bold?! I don't know if it was the friction of having my thighs working it or its sweet quiet motor humming along inside me that sent me running back to my room to lie down for a minute and enjoy that "sweet prepartion"!

I had about 3 lovely afternoon gasms that were just delightful. With the holidays coming up, I suggest you either treat yourself to this one or your someone you want to see squish and squirm.

Happy HNT: Who Needs Cup Holders?!

2010-11-17T23:50:00.001-05:00

And that's real juice chilling in that cup, I'll have you know!!

Head Talk Made Me Junglistically Horny

2010-11-17T21:06:00.004-05:00

I got to comment 21 and nearly creamed myself! Yowza! All that talk about liquid fire, swallowing, lubrication and flashbacks of my tongue ring days had me rubbing hubby's dick every time the kids turned their heads. "Go clean up!" I urged the second he finished his last bite of dinner.

Within 15 minutes he was ushering me upstairs while he kids had dessert and story time. It seemed that the door was locked and his dick was in my mouth all in the same second. I pulled back just quick enough to mumble, "You better cum fast before they come a knockin". He shoved his junk in to shut me up and his left hand held my head firmly in place while his right hand pinched my nipples.

He was so deliciously rough. I gagged to the point of near vomit and he shuddered with delight. My lips were getting bruised from the steady thrusting he did to my face. I moaned each time his tip hit the back of my throat. There was saliva running down my hand, arm, and jeans. With his fingers tangling my hair to a knotty mess I could feel he was close. I allowed my tongue to run the length of his shaft and I relaxed my throat and took him as far as I could go. He lifted off on to his tiptoes as my nostrils were met with his still shower wet pubes, and that yummy delicious molten lava of jizz floated down my throat.

Lick my lips. Yummy. Pulled up his pajama bottoms just as my toddler called out for us! Timing is everything when you've got kids, right?

Is Swallowing a Necessary Evil?

2010-11-13T22:58:00.004-05:00

Hello? Y'all know I'm not talking about me! I love to swallow, MmMm tasty!! I love to feel that hot cum trickle down the back of my throat threatening to make me gag as I choke on the last drop and lick my lips, "Thank you, may I have some more, please?"

Alas, this isn't about me, had to bring it back, whew! Anywhore, I was hanging with some of my girlfriends today when one of them admitted that she has never, ever, ever swallowed in all of your 33 years of life. Jokingly, I replied, "Well, maybe that's why your ass hasn't found the right man!"

This then prompted a 20 minute discussion about how many of us enjoy it (some on a more selective vain), the benefits of swallowing (nutrients and whatnot), the fact that none of us allow facials (nope sorry, respect the face!), and then the question came up: Is it really that important?

Personally, all the dicks I've sucked loved having me swallow their liquid fire, plus it helps that I'm extremely good at it. Plus, any guy I've ever taken the time to ask if they wanted me to swallow, the response was usually, "Um, yeah" followed by a firm palm to the back of my head and pressure to open wide. I jest. But seriously, my girl wanted me to put the question out there:

Fellas: Do you want your woman to swallow? Is there a difference in the feeling of being swallowed and popping off on, say, some tits? Is it a deal breaker? Does it influence your decision to commit to the relationship?

Ladies, you too! Thoughts? Do you swallow? Do you enjoy it? Do you do it just please your man or do you get satisfaction from doing it yourself?

Nocturnal Chat #19

2010-11-02T20:40:00.003-04:00

Halloween Fuckery

Imagine this Halloween night that my full mooned ass was ripe and ready for picking. Dressed in bright pumpkin orange pushup bra and thong panties with thigh highs to match. Around my neck, the Pussy Cape of Titillation .

Body covered from head to toe in baby oil, I set out to do my kind of trick or treating at the stroke of midnight, My goody bag full of tricks: double headed dildo, anal lube, clit stimulator, rubber gloves, nipple clamps, butt plugs, and the like.

The first house, " Trick or Treat!"

Naughty housewife replied, "Trick".

I got down on all fours for her and let her dip in the bag of debauchery. She pulled out the anal lube and rubber gloves. For 10 minutes she worked her fingers deep into my sweet hole until I cream her plush velvet carpet. Husband walked in and said, "Nice Trick, but I want my wife's treats".

The second house, "Trick or Treat!"

Dirty old man, "Treat".

He puts on some 70s jazz, drops his drawers and jerks himself off while I dance for him. His geriatric hands alternating between rubbing my girlie parts and pulling ever so hard on his wizened penis. As he sighs and cums on my tits, he says, "What a lovely treat."

The third house, "Trick or Treat!"

Filthy college frat boy with four of his friends, "How about a bit of both?"

These fine young men educated in all the ways of adulterous behavior dumped the remaining contents of my goody bag onto the center of the floor. Handcuffs and blindfold emerged. Hands tied, feet harnessed to bed posts, and eyes shielded from sin, I was taken on sexual journey of a freaky and unusual nature. Each of my holes were explored and terrorized by dicks, dildos, fingers, lips, plugs, tongues, beer bottles, and food of an assorted variety. I came, I cried, I laughed, I gagged, and I came some more.

Hours, days and nights no longer had meaning. At one point there were two dicks in my ass hole, one in my pussy and the other in my mouth. It was euphoric. They each moved to the beat of my pulsating pussy drums. My hair was yanked. My ass was slapped swollen. My nipples permanently erect from the pinching.

While I wanted them to stop, I didn't want the pleasure pain to end. I was raw, spent, and dripping with cum all over when the last frat boy dropped his load all over my said, "Thanks Mrs. P, can't wait to do this again next year!"

I MADE THE LIST: TOP 100 SEX BLOGGERS OF 2010!

2010-10-25T21:36:00.005-04:00

THANK YOU TO BETWEEN THE SHEETS AND ALL THE JUDGES THAT VOTED ME IN THIS YEAR!!!

I'M NUMBER 59 (SO CLOSE TO 69, JUST THE WAY I LIKE IT!)

BE SURE TO STOP BY AND VISIT ALL MY SEXY ASS COUNTERPARTS:

And now, your 2010 Top 100 Sex Bloggers!

(Please see this post)
TBK from The Beautiful Kind
Iona and James from SapioSlut
Quizzical Pussy from Quizzical Pussy
Sadie from Sexie Sadie’s Stories of Seduction
Vixen from Secrets of a Blue-Eyed Vixen
Adrian Colesberry from Adrian’s Blog
EA from Easily Aroused
Guy New York from Quickies in New York
Joan from Better Than I Ever Expected: Sex and Aging
25 Things from 25 Things About My Sexuality
AAG from AAG Blog
Bad, Bad Girl from BBG Blog
Holden from Packing Vocals
The blogging team at Sex is Fun
Elle from Kink Unleashed
Rachel from Rabbit Write
Clarisse Thorn from Pro-Sex Outreach, Open-Minded Feminism
littlegirlyone from littlegirlyland
Remittance Girl from Remittance Girl
Mistress Arabella from Bombshells & Rockstars
Axe from Unspeakable Axe
Coke Talk from Dear Coke Talk
Jack from Writing Dirty
Kayar Silkenvoice from Silken on Sex
The blogging team at Gentle Nibbles
Sinclair Sexsmith from Sugarbutch Chronicles
Lilly from This Could Be Dangerous…
Kit from Blogging Dangerously
Mistress Lilyana from Mistress Lilyana
TitsMcScandal from The Blogging Slave
suggestivetongue from suggestivetongue
Library Vixen from Library Vixen
Oatmeal Girl from Submission & Metaphor
Riff Dog from Ashley and Me
Rockin’ with a Cock In from Light Switch
Dick and Jane from Dick-n-Jane
Shasta from Stiletto Diaries
Athol Kay from Married Man Sex Life
Padme and Anakin from Journey to the Darkside
PrettyPowerTools from Pretty Power Tools
Dark Gracie from Gracie’s Playground
Mollena from The Perverted Negress
The blogging team at Sex in the Public Square
The blogging team at Pop My Cherry Review
Emma and Maymay from Kink on Tap
Dave from Glimpses of Dave
Jake from Facts and Friction
Sylvanus and Mina from At Longing’s End
Lucy from Sexy Blogtime
Ms. Naughty from Ms. Naughty Porn for Women Blog
Wendy Blackheart from Heart Full of Black
Cin from Seeing My Own Reflection
Holly from The Pervocracy
Lady Pandorah from Lady Pandorah’s Sanctuary
Olga Wolstenholme at Cuntlove
Jiz Lee from Jiz Lee
Aubrey from Vagina Drum
Black Pearl from The Filthy Ramblings of a Dirty Girl on Lock (THAT'S ME BABY!!)
Dallas from Naughty Americans
Jerry Jones from Little Submissions
Sir Zoomer from Vanilla-Xtract
Chantelle from Chantelle Austin International
Gloria from Gloria’s Oversexed Mind
Insatiable Desire from Insatiable Desire
Spring Flower from A Girl’s Gotta Have Options
Epiphora from Hey Epiphora
Wilhemina from Heartbreak Nymphomania
Erin from Let’s Eat Cake
Autumn from The First Day of Autumn
Kyle from Butchtastic
Cheeky Minx from Love Hate Sex Cake
Diva from Debauched Domestic Diva
Scarlet Lotus St. Syr from Purveyor of Pleasure and Wanton Lotus
Janie from A Hundred Ways to be Perverse in the Library
The Secret Slut from The Secretive Slut
Curvaceous Dee from Curvaceous Dee
Jefferson from One Life, Take Two
Kris from Phone Courtesan and Experience Kris
Lila from ¡Qué sinvergüenza!
Essin’ Em from Essin’ Em
Shon Richards from Erotiterrorist
Violet Blue from Tiny Nibbles
Evey from Voyeur on Display
Miss Mia from Things You Can’t Ask Mom
Coy Pink from No Need to be Coy
Mistress Matisse from Mistress Matisse’s Journal
Audacia Ray from Waking Vixen
That Toy Chick from Desk Full of Dildos
Britni from Oh My God, That Britni’s Shameless
SSS and ♀ from Sweat Shop Sissy
Ferns from Domme Chronicles
Jerome Nichols from Let’s Talk About Sex
Dreamwalker from Dreamwalker Sadistic Poet
Dr. Petra from Dr. Petra Boynton’s Blog
Viemoira from Cavern of the Beast
Shirley from Reptillian Prostitute
Carrie Ann from A View from the Floor
Sophia St. James from Sophia St. James XXX
YOU! As always that last person on the list is you. Please, please, please leave a comment below promoting your own blog (or the blog of someone you love). Links are welcome, as long as they lead us to a sex-related blog, not a retail website or porn aggregation site.

Fucking Orange Juice!

2010-10-25T21:17:00.004-04:00

Question: What is/was the most ridiculous fight you and your mate, spouse, lover ever had?

I originally thought ours was about fucking bread, but I was sadly mistaken when my husband this weekend tried to win a prize for world's most fucked up thing to fight about. You all have heard me lament about hubby's fucked up childhood. Well, it reared its nasty ass head on Saturday when he came home and announced that the children shouldn't be allowed to have fucking ORANGE JUICE!!

WTF??

Evidently when growing up orange juice was a luxury only meant for the grownups, and with the way it costs these days, he feels that the kids should find something else to drink that the orange juice should be for him and him alone. .

I was not raised in such a household, if it wasn't junk we were allowed to have it. Especially if it was good for us. Mind you, my 10 year old maybe drinks a glass a day, while neanderthal drinks about 3-4 glasses a day. He wants to blame her for us not ever having it in the house?? Right!

I tried to diffuse the situation by stating that when it goes on sales, I'll make sure to buy more...do you think that would end the argument?? NOOOOOOOOooooooooo!! Now the argument turned into I have no respect for him as a man, and everything has to be my way. Um, how does my wanting my kids to be able to drink fucking OJ a sign of disrespect for him????

I hate that we are doing so well in so many other ways, but he remains a fucking bully and tyrant over the dumbest shit and I have his fucked up parents to thank!!!

Vent over.

Question of the Day:

2010-09-28T18:05:00.003-04:00

What's the most random object you've put in any of your orifices?

My answers, snicker, snicker:

water bottle
banana
sharpie
brush handle
lotion bottle
pill fob
Guy's big toe

I'm sure I'm forgetting some, how about you?

Does the Curtains Match the Drapes??

2010-09-16T22:00:00.002-04:00

I've decided to grow out the perm in my hair and go au natural! I haven't see my natural hair for 21 years and have no idea what I'm in for.

My lovely pubies are long, salt and pepper, and super straight. If the hair on my head turns out to be the same, I'm going to be fucking pissed that I waisted so many years and fucking money on perming it to get it straight!!

What I wanted to know is: does the hair on your head match the hair between your legs? Do tell, please!!

Happy HNT: Buns Of Fun!!

2010-09-09T21:56:00.002-04:00

Nocturnal Chat #18

2010-08-29T12:09:00.004-04:00

Cum On My Boots

I hear his car pull up in the driveway and set my stage. Black velvet teddy peeking underneath sheet. Never worn before boots tangled haphazardly between sheets. Hand propped conspicuously over one eye, and as the keys turn in the front door, my eyes close to feign sleep. I hear him greet the dog, drop his belongings, and make his way towards the bedroom. He makes a quick stop to check on the baby and I sneak a peek as he closes the baby room door. Standing at our bedroom threshold I hear his intake of breath, "Damn," he whispers.

I feel him pass me to his side of the room and hear him shuffle through his porn drawer. "Mm hm," is the soft murmur of his selected piece. He picks the remote off the bed and sets up some background entertainment. He passes me again as he makes his way to the bathroom and turns on the shower. I'm thinking: Thank God, cuz after a double shift and I'm all dolled up, I want a fresh man! (Terrible, I know).

Once he's out of the shower, I hear him come in and close our bedroom door. Next he's sliding into bed beside me and his hands find a breast and part my legs open. His lips and his tongue are causing electric shock waves up my back and neck, while his hands and fingers moisten my thighs and harden my nipples.

I'm floating on this unbelievable current of ecstasy when he pulls me towards him and kisses me. Moans escape my lips as his find mine. My hand reaches down and pulls his dick out of my favorite pair of sexy tight briefs. His tip is already dripping with anticipation. I make a decision but before I can act on it, he's already lowering my head to rest between his legs. Must be psychic. I drink in his head slowly followed by his shaft.

He wants none of the delicacies and rams his full length down my throat. I feel myself gagging and moan at the mere thought of swallowing my man whole. This excites him and now I can feel three and then four of his fingers thrust inside my walls. The tidal of fem juice to follow arches my back and I grab his balls for further intensity. "Easy baby," he coaches me back a bit but keeps his fingers dancing in me. He caresses my face and neck as I lick him from tip to nut, suck, repeat. He grabs the back of my head in agreement and I give him what I know he wants. Deeper and deeper I take him until his pubic hairs tickle my nose and his shudders of pleasure rolls my eyes to the back of my crown.

"Come with me," he says as he pulls me off the bed, pausing to look me up and down. "Damn". I follow him out of our bedroom, through the hallway, past the confused dog in the dining room where he sits me on the stairs facing him. He opens my legs and fingers me while pulling my mouth back to his hot spot. Now with seated leverage and the use of both my hands, I grab one of his ass cheeks, give a firm grip to his shaft, and proceed to suck on my delicious caramel lollipop.

Just when I feel him tense under my grasp, he roughly turns me over and slams his dick so far into my cunt I scream on contact. The velocity to which he is fucking me has me burning my elbows, slamming my head, and breaking a nail or two on our staircase. Tears of pleasure pain run down my face with each thrust. His right hand runs up the length of my ass and back and then grips my throat as he twists me up toward him for a barely breathable kiss.

The lack of oxygen has me cumming in ways I had never felt before, I manage a weak, "M-more...d-don't s-stop..." He obliges me for what feels like an eternity and then abruptly he stops. My body, not comprehending what has happened, is still thrusting to meet him in vain agony. He walks up past me on the stairs and reaches for my hand. "We're not done yet, I promise," he pulls me upstairs into the office.

I kneel before him to worship his dick some more while he rubs and flicks and pinches my clit. I'm almost blind from my euphoria. I can feel hot liquid cascading down my legs and pooling just past my ankles inside the boots. In the far recess of my mind, I'm thinking: Shit, I just ruined these bitches...but somehow I don't fucking care. I feel a finger tentatively probing my third eye and I hold my breath as the sweet sensation of being violated hits me. I slam my mouth down hard over his entire length suffocating in the fold of his leg and thigh. His hand holds me there as I gag and convulse against him.

"No, baby, no! Not yet!" In one motion he has pulled me up and on top of him. I'm riding him and trying to catch some semblance of breath. "Breathe, baby, I don't want you passing out, breathe." He slows the stroke down but the intensity of my clit rubbing against his shaft has caught what was left of my breath and I'm cumming harder than I've cum in a looooooooooooonnnnnnnnggggggg time.

His hands clasp my ass and I sink my teeth into his shoulder with an animal strength I didn't know I had. I taste blood but can't stop myself because he's screaming and cumming, and I'm cumming and cumming and cumming. I nearly black out with his final shudder but he yanks my head up and screams, "BREATHE NOW!!" It's as if I had forgotten, in racking, raspy billows I find my breath again. The two of us sputtering and shaking until normalcy reclaimed us.

He drew small circles on my back while I kissed and inspected his badly bruised and bitten shoulder. After a few minutes like this I sat up, looked down and sadly proclaimed, "Damn, baby, I've got cum all over my boots!"

"I love you too, honey."

What I Texted for His Ride Home...

2010-08-27T22:55:00.006-04:00

Hoping to have these brand new boots up in the air tonight right around 2am!

And yes, that is velvet with 2 little velvet balls hanging down to my crotch! ;-0

I had a rough week this week, had a fight with the hubby, got grossly sick, took my daughter school shopping (those of you who have kids knows what I'm talking about - it starts off sweet and by the end of the day you're ready to rip your eyelids off with oyster forks) and that's where these boots came in.

I've been lusting after them for about 2 weeks now. They're a whopping $135, but dammit I deserved them. My legs were crying, no begging, me for some thigh high boots for years. Hubby tried to buy me a pair once that were a latex vinyl nightmare. Other times any time I've tried on a pair they always looked like pirate hooker boots. (not that there's anything wrong with that). I just wanted hooker boots that I could wear to bed and when we go out and I want to look sexy!

These beauties look great on my bare legs, jeggings, tights, or skinny jeans! I'm in fucking heaven wearing them as I blog right now. The material is like a nubuck, and it fits my thighs just right. I'm too sexy!! Dammit I feel so hot right now!

Hubby doesn't get off from work until midnight, which means he should be home by 1:30 at the latest. He better fucking take care of business tonight! I showered, shaved, and lotioned up real nice!

Lick my pussy, I'm ready!!

Happy HNT

2010-08-19T00:40:00.001-04:00

Little bit of tit-itude goes a long, long way!

Happy Sexy Birthday to ME!!! (Updated with photos)

2010-08-12T13:13:00.005-04:00

Hubby and I went away for 3 days to celebrate our 5th wedding anniversary at a lovely bed and breakfast. The only thing I told him I wanted after his long list of demands for what kind of B&B he wanted was to get fucked on the wrap around deck that he had to have. I fell in love with the bathroom, and made myself good and horny every time I went in there to shower. There was a mirror across from the shower so that I could watch myself as I lathered up, and a huge mirror behind the door that I could see not only me but the window behind me (the thought that someone else could be watching...shiver. Anyhoo... Long story short, we did have a wonderful time on our trip but alas, he did not, could not, would not fuck me on the deck.

Don't get me wrong, we had unbelievable sex four times on this little getaway, which for him is a lot. He let me suck his dick and fuck me with the deck blinds wide open and I did get him to fuck me royally from behind in front of that bathroom window you see in the pic above, a huge step for him and my bff tells me to just be happy, but I can't let it go. Am I being a bitch? Probably.

Here's the scenario that ruined it for me not-so briefly:

We had one special night out where I got all dolled up and after he made a joke about it, I even went out without any panties on. Of course, he made no under the table play, which was the first thing to annoy me. I mean why temp me to go pantyless and then don't do anything about it, huh?

Then we get back to the B&B after a scrumptious dinner and drinks to be met with chilled champagne that we had on the wrap around deck, in the dark, me in the dress still with no drawers on, the stars and ocean as our scenario, no one around, and still no play? Could I have jumped him? SURE, but I want him to come out of his sexual shell, so I waited.

We go back inside, I put on the sexy bustier that he bought for me, put it on under the fluffy robe they gave us, because he really wanted to watch a movie, and since it was "our" anniversary getaway, I felt I "had" to let him do some things that he wanted. Well, his ass fell the fuck asleep!!! When I copped an attitude, turned off the tv, got under the covers and removed the robe, he wakes up to say: "sorry babe, but you know the food, the fresh salt air, the alcohol, I'm so tired...zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz". I pretty much fumed until I fell asleep some 2 hours later.

Then I awoke at 5:30 and couldn't go back to sleep, so I decided I would get up to watch the sunrise alone (we had talked about this on our family trip that he always wants to sleep or nap during any sunrise or sunset and we've never seen one together on any of our trips, that I always see them alone). Well, he must have felt super guilty because he joined me on the balcony.

After trying to get me to tell him what was on my mind after an hour of making mindless conversation, I recounted all of the missed opportunities he had to give me the ONLY thing I asked for on this trip and that he couldn't (and I quote) "couldn't be that fucking clueless". Unfortunately for me, he admitted that he is! I had to say, "Moron, I'm still in the fucking robe with the sexy bustier under it that you bought for me, and for an hour you haven't even asked to see it or touch it...we're still on a deck on a roof, with no one awake or caring for miles...and you haven't done SHIT!!"

He started with his usual apologies about his shortcomings and how sexy I am, how much he loves me, blah, blah, blah...and then had the nerve to ask me: "What do you want me to say?" I lost it: "I DON'T WANT YOU TO SAY SHIT!! DON'T YOU FUCKING GET IT?! STOP FUCKING TALKING!! I DON'T WANT TO HEAR ALL THE SAME APOLOGIES! NO MORE FUCKING TALKING!!! OR YOU CAN GO BACK INSIDE!!"

I sulked while he pondered for what seemed like an eternity, and then he kissed me. I wanted to punch him in the face so bad because I felt like I was forcing him, you know? Then he spread my legs and fingered me so briefly that I barely got my heart racing before he said: "let's go inside". WTF!!!!! Like a little kid I said, "no no no" but he just pulled me along like the big baby I was being, brought me inside, and fucked me.

Sigh. I asked him: "you made me wait five years to get fingered on a deck in public, how many more will I have to wait for what I really want?"

His answer: {shrug}

SIGH!

OH, and I forgot the best best best. We had clearance with my mom to enjoy the full 3 days, he surprises me at dinner (before the non-deck sex) that he misses the kids and wants to leave immediately after checkout the next day, HUH?!?! (First I was extremely touched, but then I'm like: dude I'm with them all day everyday!"

I think I just need a vacation for myself, selfish, I know.

HNT All About The Shoes!!

2010-07-29T12:15:00.002-04:00

Holy Hot Shit Review!!!

2010-07-28T23:27:00.006-04:00

I got a new toy in the mail last week from the Adult Toy Shoppe to review but alas mother nature came and I didn't want to muck up my brand new Micro Bullet Vibrator, you know?

Well, hoooonnnnnnneeeeeyyyyy! Let me tell you about this little fucker right here! Now y'all know I ain't no punk! Miss Pussy likes it just about any way you give it to her...but!! This handy-dandy-holy-shit-let-me-grab-on-to-the-bed-for-dear-life was no fucking joke!!!

First, let me say that it is visually the cutest vibe I've ever had in my entire life. The thing is purple - one of my all time favorite colors!! It's soft and tiny and I was all excited to have it accompany me on my family vacation/anniversary trip but....! Now it has two speeds on it: "Oh My Fucking God!" and "Are You Out of Your Fucking Mind?!"

It had the intensity of possibly being put spread eagle naked on a lier jet with your pussy on the engine. I could barely hold it between my legs for, oh say, three seconds before I thought my coochie was going to burst into flames!!

So ssssssoooooooo disappointed that this vibe was way too intense for me! Ugh, what does that mean? Am I losing my touch? Are the gray hairs really getting to Miss Pussy? Or was this just a sucky ass vibe?

I vote for the last one...right?!

What's Shakin, Bacon?

2010-07-18T22:02:00.005-04:00

Hey Peeps!!

How's it hanging, banging, dragging, plugging, fisting, licking, sucking, bucking...in other words, how are you guys doing?

I know it's been a while since I've given you a real deal update on things, so here we go...

I'm on summer vacations - WHOO-FUCKING-HOO!!
I've lost 8lbs and have another 7 to go to reach MY ideal weight
It's fucking unbearably hot, which makes me not want to do a fucking thing on a daily basis
The kids are great, my 10yr old is driving me crazy, I'm convinced her period is coming any day now the way she runs so coocoo for coco puffs on a regular basis (one minute fine, the next minute crying over something so ridiculous I want to scream) ...plus she's a Gemini too - Good Lord! It's going to be a rough next couple of years.
Hubby and I are doing awesomely well, our sex life is thriving, the day after the wedding, we had our first "CS" (corpse sex). I was so tired and told him to have his way with me, and I'd just lie there. SIKE!! I pretty much rolled over and rode him lovely, and instantaneously passed the fuck out!
Did I mention how hot it is?!
I've come to the startling realization that my breasts are way way way huge! I've spent the past 3 weeks looking for bathing suits that actually fit them. I no longer can sport the traditional bikini (you know the triangle top) without popping out repeatedly, and this won't work on our upcoming family vacation. Normally, when I start working out, I lose weight in my tits too, this time I didn't, so the contrasted weight loss really emphasizes them (course no one's complaining)
Oh, for the first time in years, I almost caused an accident! We were driving home from hubby's bday dinner and I was wearing a sundress, ironically picked out by my daughter, that had a ridiculous cleavage. As we pull up to a red light, this older white man in a pickup truck breaks his neck as he slow motion passes us with the old man sneer and he mouths the words, "NNNNNNIIIIIIIIIIIIICCCCCEEEE"...which is immediately followed by screeching tires. I was giddy the rest of the way home! I have issues, I know. But damn it felt so good!
After a month's worth of numbness in my right foot, I was told by my podiatrist that I have Tarsal Tunnel Syndrome!! I've been out of workout commission for almost a week trying to find appropriate sneakers with good arch support. Workouts will reconvene tomorrow cuz I snagged me some Reebok's yesterday!!
Lastly, hubby and I will be celebrating our 5 year anniversary in less than a month and will be going to this lovely bed and breakfast in NJ with our own private deck. This was a huge requirement for him and I told him point blank, "If you don't fuck me on this deck that you just had to have on this vacation, I will punch you in the balls and drive home by myself!" You know I'll keep you posted on that threat!!

Missed you guys so much!!

Did you see the early HNT?!?!

2010-07-14T22:05:00.003-04:00

In case you missed it!! I'm really feeling myself...literally!

CLICK-----> HAPPY HNT!!

Photo Journal of a Filthy Bridesmaid

2010-07-12T01:28:00.005-04:00

HNT Cooling Off

2010-07-07T23:16:00.004-04:00

Peek-A-Boo...

I missed you!!

Happy HNT!!

Nocturnal Chat #17

2010-07-05T13:05:00.004-04:00

Sexual Reflections

It had been weeks since she and her lover made that special connection. This time neither she or he would take no for an answer. As he jumped in the shower to freshen up and after she had made sure both kiddies were off to LaLa Land, she slipped on the red silk nightgown he'd bought her weeks before. It lay still in the box and now she had no excuse not to put it on.

The moment she slid the gown over her head and felt the coolness of the silk against her nipples, she felt that familiar heat rise between her thighs. She stood in front of the mirror in front of their bed and marveled at the contrast of her hard nipples against the soft delicate fabric. She ran a brief had along the curves of her breasts, stomach and thighs. It was almost electric. The woman in the mirror smiled as the shower stopped but her hands did not.

The thought of him coming out any second to take advantage of her made her shiver even though it was a warm night. The bathroom door opened, the bedroom door closed, and the ceiling fan was clicked on. Her eyes never left the reflection. She could feel him watching her as her hand continued to explore herself in the mirror. She watched as one hand pinched a nipple while the other lifted a corner of the red gown and slipped a finger in that moist place between her legs. As much as she wanted to close her eyes and enjoy the butterflies meeting somewhere between her chest and naval, she couldn't. She had to see what pleasure looked like.

She heard his footsteps and then saw him theatrically remove her hand from her breast and kiss the length of her arm all the way to the nape of her neck. She inhaled deeply the fresh smell of soap off his cool body and watched her eyes become small slits as his hand joined hers underneath the gown. His fingers pushing in her fingers making her liquid flow down to both their knuckles, the reflection moaning softly.

His hardness was rubbing matter-of-factly behind her and his breathing was becoming raspy. She pushed back on him ever so slightly to get him to fall on to the bed. Never letting her go, he pulled her down on top of him, using their moist fingers to glide him inside. The instant his warmness met her, she watched as her head flew back in that first moment of sheer blissful contact.

She rode him slowly at first. Head now forward and her focus back on the reflection, she was mesmerized and how the straps of her gown fell on their own off her shoulders and her breasts bounced with the rhythm of their love making. With each orgasm her hands found their way to her hair, pulling heaps of hair off her neck so that he could see the profile of her breasts with each shudder. Rib cage elongated, sweat beading and running down her stomach, and her breath coming in and out in short labored sighs.

The light that danced in her eyes was hypnotizing and she squeezing and pulled him deeper inside of herself. She bucked and arched her back and leaned just enough backwards so that he could pull on her nipples and play with her clit. She felt the undeniable heat of a mastergasm building its way to the top of her skull to the base of her toes and she upped the tempo. She was magnificent. A black beauty riding her stallion. His grip on her tightened letting her know she wasn't alone. The walls of her pussy contracted and sucked every ounce of cum his dick had to offer her. Her hands clasped high above her head now came crashing down to rack his thighs as the climax filled her.

Her hair stuck to random areas surrounding her face, neck, shoulders, and breasts. Her skin radiated this unbelievable afterglow. With her head cocked to one side, she was almost certain she saw her reflection wink just before she turned around to tell her lover, "Thank you."

New Look...

2010-06-10T21:18:00.002-04:00

Thoughts???

So How Was Prom?

2010-06-10T00:04:00.001-04:00

Not as good as afterprom when I got FUCKED proper by my husband!!

Damn I love me some him!!

Sent from my bed as I bask in the wet spot!!

Psst...Hey...Anybody out here?

2010-06-03T21:32:00.003-04:00

Surprise!!!

It's been a while sooooooo...

Happy HNT!

Any Captions??

7 Days of Sex Challenge...

2010-05-30T11:59:00.004-04:00

I got this from Happily Married After and can't wait to talk to hubby about it!!! I know I've been hit or miss lately but school is almost over and you guys will have me all to yourselves for the entire summer!!!!!

Here it is:

It would have been comical to call ‘7 straight days of sex’ a challenge as a brand new married couple, but if you’ve been married any length of time or especially if you have kids, you know how busy things get. You know that time, responsibilities, and general exhaustion indeed make that a challenge. I ran across this challenge on blog, One Extraordinary Marriage. And of course it caught my attention so I wanted to share the opportunity with you.

Here’s the rub (pun intended):

What is the 7 Days of Sex Challenge: it’s you and your spouse having sex for 7 straight days from June 6th to June 12th, 2010

It’s an opportunity for you and your spouse to really focus on each other and make intimacy a priority in your marriage
It’s an opportunity to take your communication to the next level as you plan each day’s rendezvous and negotiate thru life as well
It’s a time for you to get creative – let’s face it, having sex in the same place, same position and the same time of day for seven days can be a little boring
Use this challenge as a way to break out of your routines and try something new, romantic and different.
Your marriage will be stronger as a result of focusing on intimacy during these seven days

Most of us haven’t had this many consecutive days of sex probably since our honeymoons. So if that isn’t reason enough to participate, Tony & Alisa at One Extraordinary Marriage have daily prizes and one grand prize for those who participate! Wow, getting rewarded for having sex! Does it get any better? To participate check their site out here

What are your thoughts on this challenge? Will you and your spouse participate?

It's all in the approach...

2010-05-15T00:57:00.003-04:00

Yesterday as I was leaving the house to go to BJ's to do some grocery shopping (do you know this is the first time I made the filthy connection to the store being called BJs...I'm over here giggling like a 13 yr old!)

Anyhoo, as I'm getting ready with the baby at my ankle, hubby walks over grabs my ass in one hand and a tit in the other, and kisses the ever loving shit out of me! I think I was temporarily blinded! That kiss made me actually weak in the knees, and weaker still when he whispered, "I'm going to wait up for you, come in and put on something sexy."

WHOA!! Hubby is doing the damn thing! You've never seen a woman grocery shop so fast in your life with 2 kids in tow, get home, organize groceries, put kids to bed, shower, and then get fucked real proper like! I was the stuff blogs were made for - get it? I'm giddy, I know!

Smooches!

Happy Belated Mother's Day (Bonus HNT)

2010-05-12T22:14:00.003-04:00

I'm terrible I know! I've been getting killed at work and my organization has had me working overtime during my usual blogging down time. But I wanted everyone to know, I'm still here, lurking in the shadows, missing you all terribly!! And hopefully sooner than later, I'll have my filthy hours back to myself really soon!!!

Happy Dirty Mama's Day! Better late than never - right?

MUAH!!!

*BRAND NEW - NOCTURNAL REVIEW!!!!

2010-04-24T15:10:00.004-04:00

I was recently contacted by one of the adult websites to write them reviews for products, and after the initial shock of "wow, somebody actually wants my opinion", I was all set!! I figured, as only I know how, to do a review in complete Black Pearl Style!! Since this is the first I wanted to set you all up for future posts like this one. Ok, so I'll let you in on the who: The Adult Toy Shoppe and I are now BFFs in smut!! They have great sex toys among other delicious items!! I'll always give you the who, the what, the where is here, and the how...well that's the best part!!

When I saw this beautiful Nubby Crank Butt Plug, I just had to have it. It has a fucking crank on it!! Wouldn't you want one?!?!

I comes in this beautiful purple (who loves purple more than BP?) cushioned pouch with a tie string to keep it safe from harm.

Nocturnal Review

I had a meeting in the city on Wednesday which let out a little early and since none of the other teachers were going back to work why should I. I decided to go home and surprise Hubby. I pull into the driveway and already my pussy is throbbing especially since we just had sex on Monday after a month's hiatus, I felt we had a lot of catching up to do. I tiptoe into the room and swipe the Crank and the lube out of the drawer. I rush into the bathroom and let the ice cold Nubby slide its way into my ass. I swear I got hit with a mini-gasm the base of the crank hit the space between my ass and my pussy. I tiptoed back into the room and begin to undress.

Hubby wakes up while I'm taking my shirt off. "What are you doing home so early?"

I climb on top of the bed and shower him with kisses, "Surprise! My meeting let out early and I wanted to surprise you!"

"You definitely achieved that but you better stop with all of this kissing unless you want this to go somewhere."

"Um, honey...why the fuck do you think I'm taking my clothes off while I slip my tongue in and out of your mouth?"

"Is that so?!" He playfully throws me off of him and shoves me on to my back.

The pressure of the nubby sends another wave through me causing me to cry out.

"What was that for? I didn't do anything yet?"

"Oh, honey, but you did!"

I pull him to me and wrap one are around his neck for a deep kiss and with my other hand I'm roughly taking his dick and pushing it inside of me.

I can actually feel his head pass over the head of the nubby, and I squeeze my legs around his waist not wanting him to move from the spot he's in.

I slowly rock my hips back and forth loving the feeling I'm getting from having the two of them inside of me. We stay here until my arched back forces my breasts into his chest and I scream outloud, "Gotdammmmmm!"

"Wow, baby, that was pretty fast for you! And I barely touched you".

"Oh, so you wanna touch me, do you?" I ease him off of me and turn on to my stomach. I slowly present my ass for him to see.

"Oh, my!! If it isn't what caused our little fight last week!"

Without another word for instruction, hubby takes that crank with his thumb and forefinger and starts to twist the shit of it. He doesn't even start slow, he goes from zero to a hundred and I'm creaming all down my thighs. Before I can reach down to grab his dick he's already slamming his head into the super whet folds. He's ramming me and twisting the crank as if his life depended on it. I near the point of suffocation, I can't stop the continuous onslaught of orgasms. I'm screaming, literally screaming between ragged choked breaths. I feel as if my heart is going to explode but before it does, he announces, "Aw fuck, I'm cummmmmiiiiinnnnnnnggggg!" He lets go of the crank, grabs my tits, and shoots his hot load inside.

As we both relax our breathing, he gently slides the nubby out for me, and kisses me on the back of my neck.

"Um, honey, that was great and all, but the day is still early and we've got about one hour before the kiddies are home, so if you don't mind getting off me so I can get to the gym!"

What? A nooner and the gym all before the kids get home, I don't know when I'll get another opportunity like that!!! Plus, he passed out before I could get my workout pants on! HA!

Chocolate Cocks Anyone?

2010-04-17T13:51:00.000-04:00

At a bachelorette party in CT and I'm the only sistuh, but they made
sure I was represented!!

Screamed on Hubby!!! Need Your Insight!!!

2010-04-11T13:41:00.005-04:00

HOLY SHIT!!! Poor hubby had no idea what hit him!! Here's what happened...

I joined forces with this website to get some yummy products and will be reviewing for you all shortly. Anyway, I got my first delivery in the mail yesterday. I was running around all day and my mother was coming over to watch the kids, so I asked him to please put the box in our room. Whenever I order toys I use a funny name so hubby knows not to touch the box, right? We've had several jokes about it, this way he knew right away what "kind" of package was inside. Anyway, I go about my business for the day, and when I bring mom home I notice the box is open by the trash can, and I silently freak out. FUCK!!!! Hubby is asleep and I have to leave for a birthday party so my rant has to wait several hours.

When I'm finally on my way home at 1am, I call him at work breaking, "Why did you open MY box?!?!" He's all, "Isn't that what you wanted me to do?" NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I reminded him of our conversation and then screamed, "I NEVER OPEN YOUR BOXES....EVER!!!!" I asked how did he know it wasn't a surprise inside or something? And I couldn't stop yelling how I never open his packages no matter what they are: car parts, work out equipment, sneakers, toys, etc. Then he starts yelling back that next time I ask him to move something he'll "just fucking leave it sitting there for mom or kids or whoever to find it and open it". I yelled, "Unlike you, my mother wouldn't fucking open MY MAIL!!!!" Oh, poor thing couldn't understand for the life of him why I got so bent out of shape after wanting him to be more involved sexually.

I felt almost violated. That he had robbed me of that joy of first opening a present and seeing what's inside. Not to mention, I didn't know what was going to be on the packing slip, and I had reason for concern since they wrote "review for black.pearl36d" on it!!! FUCK!!!!!!! Not to mention that he wanted to know if I used one of my coupons in "our" drawer and I said no, because this was from a new website, to which he replied, "oh, that explains why I didn't recognize anything on the receipt!!!!! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??!??! I tried doing a google search on myself and thankfully only bras came up. Hopefully, he won't do any real searching to see the what and where of my purchases.

All of this box confusion prompts the huge question: What if he finds out? Lordy lord lord!!

Did I overreact? How would you guys feel in the same situation? Thoughts...PLEASE!!

HNT FAT

2010-04-08T21:21:00.003-04:00

NEED TO LOVE FIVE MORE FUCKING POUNDS

(AND THEN ANOTHER FIVE MORE FUCKING POUNDS)

ISN'T IT WORSE SAYING YOU NEED TO LOSE 10 POUNDS??!?!

FIVE AND FIVE SEEMS SO MUCH EASIER!!

HAPPY HNT!!!

100 FOLLOWERS: YOU LIKE ME, YOU REALLY FUCKING LIKE ME!!!

2010-04-05T23:05:00.004-04:00

Sometimes I feel no love but today I feel the love of

100 FREAKY SNEAKY NASTY FOLLOWERS!!!!

Thank you all for always cumming through,

I hope I've given you plenty to think about,

masturbate over, laugh out loud from,

cry in frustration with, and just plain enjoy!

To my faithful crew:

YOU ARE THE BESTEST!!

I love all the support you've given me from the very beginning!!

To all my newbies:

I hope you keep cumming back...

again, and again, and again!!

Oh, yeah, as your phine ass reward and cuz a filthy girl always keeps her promises,

here's that wedding pic of me I promised...

Vacations almost over...with Bonus HNT

2010-04-05T00:15:00.005-04:00

I've had a full week off from work and what do I have to show for it? Hm? I figured I would have gotten a shitload of blogging done, but alas I had spring cleaning to do that took up the first 3 days of my break. Then the past 4 days have been a world wind of kiddie play dates, errands, taking care of mom (foot surgery - she's fine), new Mac set up (yup, I'm blogging on my new Mac that is taking quite some getting use to), filing, wedding, grown up play dates with girlfriends...and so on and so on...

Now with 2 days left of my vacation I felt compelled to take a break from swapping the winter clothes to spring/summer clothes...yes, less clothes means I have to really get on my weight loss gain grind. I wanted to give you guys a little sneak peek at what I'm working with. Hubby and I went to a wedding this weekend and it was ghetto fabulous! I've never seen so much fake everything in my life!! Fake hair, fake boobs, fake eyelashes, OH MY!! I spent 4 hours picking out a dress that would make me look "not fat", I almost had a nervous breakdown in the dressing room because I'm between sizes and nothing fit properly, then i show up to the wedding and I totally could have showed up in a burlap sack!

I looked fucking amazing compared to the hot ass mess that was walking around this fine catering hall. Why is it that women don't realize there are clothes restrictions when you reach certain sizes?!?! Now I have nothing against big girls, IF you know how to work what you got, y'all know what I mean. My aunt is a big girl and she looks good in everything she wears, because she gets it to fit, and what she picks fits who she is. Anyway, there were some size 20+ chicks at this wedding in size 2 dresses and it was not a good look at all! After taking some pics I turned to hubby and said, "There is something very specific that I need you to say about how I look tonight". Without skipping a beat or pausing, he said, "Babe, you are the best, baddest, and hottest chick in this entire place, and that includes the bride!" The BRIDE, how in the hell does anyone show up to a wedding and look better than the fucking bride!! She was queen hot mess! Now I have three tattoos, but I feel that there's a time and a place to show them off. This chick had huge tattoos on both of her arms, and so did each of her bridesmaids, and I overheard several women in the ladies room talking about how in poor taste it was to pick dresses that accentuated them...wow!!

It was even more funny listening to hubby's friend (a plus size chick in a petite mini dress that did not hide her three stomachs) talk about how ghetto SHE thought the wedding was, now that's irony for you! Anyway, I have some special pics of my very, very, very sexy stilettos that I wore just for hubby (even though he had to go to work after the wedding, the image of me in these shoes will forever taunt him every time he closes his eyes.

Are you ready?

These are now the highest pair of heels for outside the house!!

Are you sure you want to see them?

I promise to post pics of me in the hot little black cocktail dress later today, I promise.

Am I stalling?

Nah, here ya go!

Well, whaddaya think??

Wouldn't Believe Me If I Told You...Bonus HNT

2010-03-21T23:23:00.007-04:00

Two weeks ago I wanted to have a night out with hubby and it got all fucked up. He didn't sleep when he got off work, he ate before I got home, and I had my period. This past Friday, I demanded a redo, got the babysitter, and I was ready to go. First, we sat around for about 30 minutes weighing our options. We had a open invitation to join my BFFL and her fiance, but hubby didn't really feel up to driving all the way out to the city. I wanted to make sure we got some family time in since it was so early. We ended up taking the kids and sitter to see Alice In Wonderland (great movie by the by)...anyhoo...afterwards we rushed home for a change of clothes for dinner. It was 9:20 by the time we ran out the door, the restaurant I picked stopped serving dinner at 9:30, thank goodness their a mom-n-pop type place becuase they fed us and gave us some kickass libations! Got the night off to a fabu start.

Both of us have be dying to check out this local lounge with our kind of flavor and it didn't disappoint. We saw more of us in one room than we've had the entire time we've been in this neighborhood! Who knew! At least now when we need a place to go chill with our friends for drinks after hours we've got some place to go that's not far from home. We had some drinks there, enjoyed the music, and did I mention I looked fucking PHYNE as hell?! I had on my black stilletto boots, black tights, and a black&white zebra print t-shirt dress that was so short that if I even raised my hand you could see my lacy black thong? I felt like myself (oh, yeah, I've lost 8lbs - forgot to mention that too!!) So I'm feeling damn good, and hubby's rubbing my legs and we're kissing, and I'm just about drunk as hell when he says, "Let's go, I got another spot I want us to check out." I'm hyped because it's only 1:30am and we're still out!!

We get in the car and I'm feeling good, and then I'm feeling fucking ecstatic because where is this spot that hubby wants us to check out???? You'll never guess, cuz this is hubby we're talking about! Are you ready for this?? My hubby took me to the local HOTEL/MOTEL/HOLIDAY INN, SAY WHAT? I was so excited! I could barely contain myself, I didn't even know how to act for a hot minute! We even had to switch rooms because the first room the porn channel wasn't working, you can't have hot motel sex without porn, right? I felt like such a little slut. I was hubby's rent-a-whore for the night and I was in love!!

I took these while he showered, he told me I didn't have to because he wanted me musty. Le Sigh! This is what the room looked like and this is how awesome my ass looked in my outfit!! I even forgot that this was one of my fantasies! Trashy motel sex, yummy! When he came out of the shower, I was still dressed (b/c I was taking pics for you guys!), and I told him I wanted him to undress me. Which he did! Starting with my boots first, bra last. We kissed, we pinched, he rammed his three fingers deep in my pussy so hard I kicked the remote off the bed in my bodyspasm!

When he entered me, I saw stars, literally, alcohol is a powerful drug when you haven't had it in over 3 years! Whew! The room was spinning and I felt as if my body was just along for the ride. He fucked me so hard he ripped my pussy in two, but did that stop me? (it should have) But no, I climbed on top of his ass and worked my pussy so hard on him I almost caught my ass on fire. I rode his dick and squeezed it so good, my man was calling my name telling me not to stop!

I got off of him for fear of blacking out and just when I caught my breath, he shoved his dick down my throat and I sucked at it hungrily. I licked and sucked while he fingered me again. My pussy was raw and burning from the pain of our delicious romp so when he dropped his face between my legs all I could do was scream at the top of my lungs, "Thank you, thank you, thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou....!"

He asked me if I was ok, I told him I was dying and he asked if I wanted him to stop, I told him no, and to keep fucking me. He did! He flipped me on to my stomach, grabbed a fistful of my hair and I thought my pussy was going to retreat into my asshole it hurt so much, and still I didn't care (fucking alcohol). When I opened my eyes to look in the full length wall to wall mirror and watched him fuck me, oh my lord, I will have that image to tide me over for weeks! He caught my eye and asked, "Do you want me to cum now?" This time common sense kicked in and I pleaded: "YES, PLEASE!"

With seven more strokes, yes I counted down the death of my pussy, it was painfully, blissfully over! I hadn't been fucked like that in a long time. And now that my pussy is obliterated, it may not be for weeks to cum. I'm completely and utterly shredded down there (if any of my slutty bloggers have any tips to correct this, PLEASE LET ME KNOW ASAP!!).

All-in-all, I am completely proud and impressed with my hubby's ability to be spontaneous and for him courageous! Spring has sprung in his loins and it's going to be one sexy ass season!!

New Style w/Early HNT

2010-03-16T20:41:00.001-04:00

I decided I needed a little change and cut about 3" off my hair.
Figured since I have parent-teacher conferences this Thursday I'd give you an early HNT. And I'm sticking with my hints of purple :-p.

Thoughts on the new do and the need for change every once in a while??

Nocturnal Chat #16

2010-03-10T22:08:00.018-05:00

Purple Reign

Dammit! I'm going to kill my ex-wife, got me going to the junior high for parent-teacher conferences for my daughter when I was supposed to be at the high school for my son! I'm rushing now against the clock in hopes to meet with just one of his teachers. Mrs. Davids is my son's English teacher and for the first time in years, not only is he passing, but she's recommending him for honors. I have to meet this teacher to see what she's done to turn him around.

Ok, got a parking spot but I see a lot of people leaving. Time check: it's 8:47 and conferences end at 9. Scanning the listing of teacher rooms and of course! She's on the 3rd floor. I'm running, I'm running. "Oops, I'm so sorry, didn't mean to knock you over!" Damn, that lady sure is mad. Alright, two more classrooms and I'll be there, let me slow down, breathe a little bit. Here we go.

Mrs. Davids has her back to me as she's putting on her coat, time check: I still have 9 minutes. "Hm hm". I clear my throat to let her know she has a parent, and I'll be damned if her shoulders don't slump and the slightest sigh escapes as she removes her coat. She turns around and steps in front of the desk in one svelt move, and I forget I'm a parent here to discuss my son for a moment.

My eyes scan her quickly, trying not to be rude until my eyes land on her purple ass boots. Her legs are nothing to gloss over but there's something about the boots that make me nervous.

Now it's her turn to clear her throat, "Hm hm", as she extends a hand towards me. Dumbfounded, I take it and give it a limp shake and release it to sit at the chair in front of her desk. If I held it a second longer, I might have had to pull her towards me for a closer introduction.

"And you are?" She brings me back.

"Oh, I'm Sam's father. I just wanted to meet the teacher that single handedly turned my son around." At this she flashed her pearly white teeth that glistened between too luscious lavender lips. Wonder what else is purple.

"Sam is a delight to have in class, and he shows such leadership for the other boys," she crosses and uncrosses her thick shapely legs and I could swear I can hear the 'swish' of her stockings between her thighs. I get goosebumps.

"I can see why, if you were my teacher, I wouldn't fail either," Shit, did I say that outloud?

She giggles and reaches for my hand, "Thank you, that is so sweet of you to say...and don't worry I get that a lot teaching this all boys class." She gives my hand a squeeze, looks down at her boots and crosses her legs again. This time I'm sure she did it purposely for me. "Your son liked them too today."

I wonder if this is how my son feels sitting in her class looking at her fine ass everyday! "Um, it's just that, I can't figure it out, but I feel like I know these boots. I'm sorry for staring. Maybe my ex-wife has a pair." Had to throw in the ex-wife thing just in case.

"Oh?" She lets that hang in the air for a bit before reaching down a hand to pat my knee. "I just figured you liked them, that's all."

Beeep.

"Attention parents thank you for coming to this term's parent-teacher conference. The time is now 9pm and conferences are officially over for the evening."

Beeep.

I jump so fast out of my seat that it falls crashing to the floor taking two other chairs with it. "I'm so sorry." I manage to blubber out. Within a flash she's in front of me and I was so fixated by the purple boots, I failed to notice two of her blouse buttons are now open and exposing a bountiful cleavage under a purple lace bra. Answers that question.

"Leaving so soon? We haven't even really begun to discuss Sam's full potential."

"But, um, don't I have to leave now?" I'm in a panic as security pops in to remind me I have to vacate the building. In a nanosecond, her coat is back on and she produces a large box, "It's alright fellas, Mr. Johnson is helping me to my car." As she hands me the box which weighs all of 2 ounces, she squeezes my dick so hard I almost moan out loud.

With her keys in her hand and a flick of the light switch, she commands, "Shall we?"

...To be continued

Apologies!

2010-03-07T21:37:00.003-05:00

It's been pretty hectic all around for me lately, I'm almost two weeks without a post!
Damn!
WTF!
Don't you hate it when life just seems to get the best of you??
To the point where sex, yes sex!, is now becoming an issue??
OMG!
Hubby's got himself a little silicone pussy in his drawer and I think she's seen more action than I have (it's totally my coochie problems this time, though)
WTF!
I miss you guys so much, and I'm hoping to get back in the naughty swing of things this week!
*tear*
My brain is completely and utterly overwhelmed with filthy mcnasty stuff, just don't have the time nor patience to get it out!
HUH?!
Thanks for still checking in on me, I appreciate all the love and am excited to hopefully reach my 100th Follower in the next cumming weeks!
Yay!

TMI Tuesday!

2010-02-23T22:18:00.002-05:00

Haven't played in a while but here goes:

1. For self-arousal, if you could reach any part of your body with your mouth, which part would you like to reach and why?
Duhhhh, I would love to sit and lap up my kitty all fucking day long!

2. If you reached that part of your body, how often and how long would you want to stay there?
See above answer!! lmao

3. If the opportunity arose, what would you like to do to someone else that you have never been game to try before?
Fuck a man in the ass with a strap-on! (not that I was never game for it, no man has ever been game for it with me!)

4. You have been selected to swap one of your organs with another member of the opposite sex. What would you swap and why? Who would you choose as the organ donor?
I would love to have the power of a man's dick at least once in my life! And there are a few big dick daddies I can think of to trade with

5. Overnight you have a beauty sleep and inexplicably awaken at dawn having now turned into the most beautiful person on the planet. What would you do differently for the next 24 hours?
Not a damn thing...I don't think...hm

Bonus Question: You are noticed by a talent scout and invited to star in your own x-rated movie for world wide distribution. You are asked to write the plot. Describe your movie plot in one sentence of no more than 20 words.
Wife gets hubby to befriend lover and has lover organize a grown-up playdate for all three!

How My Ass Got So Slick!!

2010-02-19T21:28:00.004-05:00

I've teased you all long enough! As you all know, due to my procedure, I couldn't have sex soooooooooo....

Hubby and I decided no gifts this V-day and we would just go out for dinner and a movie. We went to this great restaurant (Fishtail by David Burke - yummy Cheesecake Lollipop Tree for dessert) and went to see Book of Eli with Denzel (equally yummy after dinner treat).

I've been feeling a little hefty lately but tried my best to sexy it up with peek-a-boo purple knit sweater, a black & purple pin striped mini, and my stiletto boots. Hubby was extremely complimentary all night and I reminded him of my promise from when he took care of me pre-op.

Well, after picking up the baby, we didn't get home until almost two in the morning and peanut decided it was play time until almost three! I put on a simple nightie because I knew there wouldn't be any sex happening...and then he kissed me. I mean, really kissed me. Tongue and everything. (I know!!) The juices started flowing and heating up, and I asked him if we could pretend we were back in high school and have some playful petting and dry humping. He said yes, and we got to groping. Full on heavy breathing, tit sucking, dick grabbing, ass hugging... it was no teenage movie scene here. I slid my panties down just enough to let the tip of his dick rub up against my clit and I came with a fury. I forgot what it was like to be young, dumb and full of cum for a moment!

Who told me to cum? The next thing I know he's yanking down his drawers full blast and asking for a blow job. Now I know I promised but because his head was all up near my stuff, things got a tad bit messy and I had to say no. Sorry, I love the taste of myself more than any chick out there but I'm not one for tasting me with a cherry on top, get my drift? He was completely understanding and we continued making out some more and then I offered him a tittie fuck or an ass cheek fuck. He stopped kissing me for a moment to mull it over and quickly said no to the tittie fuck, "How bout I fuck you in the ass, or is it too soon for that too?" Unfortunately again, I had to rebuff him because all things south were wicked sore, as quickly and nicely as I came the nagging soreness was still there.

He turned over, reached in his drawer for the lube, told me to turn on my stomach and he greased me up nice and slick. Then with one hand he grabbed a tit and the other hand he slid his dick between my cheeks and had himself a grand ole ass time!! He came shortly thereafter and it was soooooo much that I had to see for myself, but if I moved it would have slid off. I grabbed my phone and asked him to take a picture of my ass for me. He called me silly but did it anyway. Then the two of us remarked on how absolutely glorious my ass looked. He went into the bathroom to clean up and I hit the blogger upload button!! The rest you've all seen for yourselves.

So while we didn't actually have sex on V-day, we still had an amazing night. But, oh, wait until next year!! (Read my rant on Erotic NY)

HAPPY LOVER'S DAY - BONUS HNT

2010-02-14T12:05:00.003-05:00

HAPPY LOVER'S DAY BLOGGERS!!!

MY ASS SLICK WITH OIL AND CUM

Will share details later...(I know I'm such a wicked tease!)

Since you're here,

Be sure to check out my latest post over at Erotic NY!!!!

No Nocturnal Chat Here - This is the real deal!

2010-02-06T22:14:00.004-05:00

Two days before surgery hubby tells me he's not going to be getting much sleep and he'd like me to put on something that he bought me with stillettos to match. I get dressed in this long black lace gown with tiny spaghetti straps and I put on his favorite red fuck me heels. He tells me to lay down and get comfortable while he sets up.
The first thing he does is blindfold me. (Yes, he did) I can hear him tinkering around in the kitchen and by the time he comes back into the room, I can smell the burning of a match. He lit scented candles. He kisses me gently on the lips and then I can hear him opening the massage oil bottle.
He massages me from head to toe, softly in some places and not so gently in others. It was wonderful. Then he pulls my gown up over my hips and slides my g-string down my legs...slowly, deliberately. He's at the end of the bed as he slides his warm hands up the length of my legs and roughly parts them. He sinks his palms beneath my ass and buries his face in the warmness of my pussy. His tongue and lips lap me up until I cum moments later. He doesn't stop. He squeezes my ass tighter and sinks his tongue in deeper. I cum more. He kisses me then allowing me to enjoy my own sweet juices. I love the taste of me.
He kisses my ears, my throat, then sucks on each of my breasts. I'm going crazy. I'm so wet I can feel my pussy lips slipping and sliding against one another. I want him inside of me. I ache for him. He holds my face, tells me how much he loves me, kisses me as he enters me. That first penetration is the sweetest bliss ever.
We make love for almost two hours and I'm in my glory. We go from position to position, the whole while he's kissing me and telling me the most loving things. When he flips me onto my stomach and I feel him reaching over the bedside I'm wonderfully surprised when he twists my glass dildo into my ass. I'm cumming rivers now and bucking wildly into him to deepen the penetration. The almost realfeel of my fantasy threesome is overwhelming and the multiples consume me. We cum together, panting, clutching, rubbing, clinging to one another.

It was beautiful! I am so proud of him, and I can't wait for the two week coochie recovery to be over to repay him!

Coochie Status...

2010-01-31T21:50:00.006-05:00

Just wanted to let everyone know that the coochie surgery went well!

Image by mayhem via Flickr

Pussy and Pearl are doing quite well.
Recuperated most of the weekend.
The pussy will be back and cumming to her usual dirly girl hyjinx in less than 2 weeks!
To those that shouted me out behind the scenes: THANK YOU!!

P.S. - I owe you all a fabulous tale of how hubby prepped me for surgery!! Watch out for it a a few days!!!

This pic reminded me of the surgery!! If you can't laugh at yourself, well, you know the rest!!

Latest Erotic NY Post

2010-01-24T17:34:00.003-05:00

Check it out:

"DANCING FOREPLAY" - EROTIC NY

What are your thoughts on sex and dancing?

Nocturnal Chat #15 (w/Bonus HNT)

2010-01-20T20:39:00.017-05:00

The Gang's All Here

It was a dark and sexy Gray night outside and I was feeling particularly horny.

Stuck in traffic and all I could think about the entire drive home was getting some sweet ass Phallatio seconds after walking through my front door.

I look up at the night sky thinking of all the naughty possibilities and I must be really fiendish because somehow the J Star is looking like a big, long, sparkly Topaz penis.

I roll down the windows for some fresh air and crank the radio only to hear Afrochica smack talkin' about her latest conquest on Erotic NY FM.

She stops just short of making herself cum on live radio to take a few calls.

The first caller is Ella, some woman musing about how good of a lover her man is.

I'm Dewey wet listening to the tale she spins, and I'm reminded of my past.

But I have a Confession to make, My Down Low Life was shady, I used to have sex here, there and everywhere, and with whomever I cared!

But alas, I'm a Reformed Slut who saves all her Soul for her man at home.

See, my man has these strawberry Freckles all over his body, and I love to play connect the dots with my tongue.

Years before I took lessons from a Library Vixen on the "Art of Tongue",

and every man, including my own cannot thank me enough.

I don't know if it was the sex philosopher, Frenchy, who said,

"If you lick it, he will cum",

but my ass is home and my panties are around my ankles before I can get the key in the lock!

I think I love him! (Belated HNT)

2010-01-17T23:14:00.010-05:00

I can't believe that after everything we went through last year (or better yet all the shit I went through last year), I think I may have fallen back in love with my husband. Surprised? I know I am! Over the past few months, he has been doing everything in his power to listen and address my needs. And the biggest surprise is that we haven't had a fight in so long that I don't remember our last fight. (for us that's huge!!)

When did I realize I was falling back in love with him, you ask? Last night as a matter a fact. After New Year's I did tell him that I thought this year would be our best year ever as a couple and he agreed with me. I've heard from other couples that the first five years are the hardest and once you get past those, it's smooth sailing. We'll just see about that! Anyway, back to last night. I'm in an organization that had an event which was supposed to last only 3 hours, but ended up lasting almost 6, and hubby was a good sport about the whole thing. He kept watch on the kids and didn't complain once. That may not seem like a big deal to you guys but it was for me! The venue was packed and it had to be about 100 degrees inside and he sat in these very small, very uncomfortable seats with the baby climbing all over him. He endured all of this without the promised food like we thought we were getting during the show, and he managed all of this practically by himself because I had to perform. But that's not when the love hit me.

After the event we rushed home, changed clothes and went back out to birthday/benefit party. I put on a pair of what he calls "Alicia Keys Superhero Pants" (you know that faux leather stretch pants that's the rave right now?) and a cute top. He loves these pants! After having a bite to eat at the party and enjoying an unsolicited dance together (did I ever mention how much he doesn't like to dance, well, he came and pulled me onto the dancefloor - I love to dance!), I felt a little spark.

We were having a good time joking around with my family while I do what I normally do: grab and rub his ass. For the first time, in I think EVER, he said, "I wish they would turn down the lights so I could grab you and grind you up against the wall as if we're at an old school basement party". I told him don't be shy, and that lights never stopped me from groping him in public or in front of my family. He worried that my mother would have a fit, but still he held me tightly and indulged my kisses and gropes. While sitting, he ran a hand up my inner thigh, and said, "I really love these pants!" Of course, I let him know that's why I bought them. He then asked, "So how's your business doing down there?" I lied and told him I was still in the red (see previous post). He wasn't fazed in the slightest. We even had some fun posing for pictures in front of my mother, aunts, uncles, and cousins, where I wrapped a leg around his waist and humped him. This shot was taken after the humpage thus the reason for me cheezin'! (note the tight squeeze I'm still giving him!)

Fast forward home, we pay the babysitter, and I tell him that he should take a shower (he knows this usually means he's gonna get a blow job because I like things fresh! I freshen up first and then when he's in the shower I put on a cute little teddy and wait for him in the bed. Remember we'd been going all day long and now it's almost midnight. He gets in bed and he's kind of flipping through channels. I ask him to rub my ass, and he says, "You should have kept the pants on". I admitted that I had thought about it, but then they're way too hard to take off. He was lying on his back, and I had my right leg draped over his crotch and was gently kneading him while he caressed me.

When the clock hit midnight, he turned off the TV, turned to me and said, "Are you done teasing me yet?" We kissed, and his fingers found my sweet spot. He started off really rough and I had to remind him that she was still very sensitive. He ushered my head down to his head, and I sucked him lovingly for a little bit. When I came back up, he was kissing me all over my face and neck, and whispering how much he loved me. And then he said it, "I'm going to fuck you the way you deserve to be fucked". That was the moment. Now this may not be a big moment for many, some may hear it all the time, but he's never said that to me. There was something in his voice, in his eyes even, that I'd never heard or seen before. I kept my eyes open far more this time than any other time in our almost 6 years together. I took in his arms, his hands, his shoulders, his chest, his mouth, and his eyes. True to his word, he did fuck me and love me the way I wanted and needed last night. No bells and whistles as you may assume, it was just the two of us, locked tightly, and he fucked me so well that I got not one, but two charlie horses that made me stop, scream, and cry out in pain. (I performed yesterday for the first time in over ten years, wore heels for the majority of the day, and was being pushed to the brink of ecstacy...it's no wonder my calves and thighs gave out!) Both times he stopped, massaged the knots and pain away, and then returned to giving me my just desserts! Plus, my poor pussy was swelling with each tender but rough thrust, but that pain I pushed through! I climbed on top of him and we climaxed simultaneously as he held me tight and told me once more how much he loved me. And just when I thought to myself: wow, this would be perfect if he...before I could finish my thought, I felt both of his hands on the sides of my face as he swept the hair away from my eyes and kissed me. Perfection. I knew for real that I had fallen back in love with my husband.

Dry Spell...help!

2010-01-12T21:06:00.003-05:00

Image by hannahspanna via Flickr

Ok, it's been a couple of days since I've posted. Been sick with icky cold and about to have a lovely fem procedure in a few weeks so my mind has been elsewhere. Can you guys give me some ideas on what you like me to blog about? I've hit the creative wall with full velocity! Tell me what you crave from me...what dirty little things can I whisper to you in the dead of night? Tell me babies, please!

Erotic NY Post...

2010-01-03T14:35:00.002-05:00

Hot of the Blog press!!

Shout it out loud: I love fucking!! Read Black Pearl's hot, new blog, "Nymphomania Redefined".

Nocturnal Chat #14

2009-12-28T23:40:00.003-05:00

Working It Out - Conclusion

I didn't hear her come in. I didn't see her naked body. I didn't realize what was going on until I felt her part my legs and bury her face there in my most steamy place. I arched my back as she lavishly sucked my feminine juices. With one hand squeezing my hardened nipples, and the other gripping her head from behind, I couldn't control the moan that escaped from my lips.
MmM.
This only intensified her adoration of me. Her tongue went deeper, she plucked a finger in and out of my tight muscle with such precise skill I forgot about my husband at home for a moment or two.
She licked.
She nibbled my clit.
She ran her fingers straight through my downtown hairs.
She probed with hands, lips, tongue, mouth.
Never letting me out of her sight.
Her intense gaze forcing me in.
Making me want her.
Asking for permission just this once.
I closed my eyes and inhaled the sweet pungent steam that was me.
My nostrils filling with the scent of hot saliva and female toxins.
When I opened my eyes and connected with hers once again, she knew what I wanted.
She knew what I wanted before I even met her.
She knew that today was her day to make me hers.
When she stood up, I saw it.
I knew she had no doubt in her mind what was going to happen here.
Attached to black leather straps was a 9" steel dick .
The middle strap sunk deep within her vaginal walls causing it to drip and scorch the steam room floor.
"Turn around". That was my only instruction.
The only sound she made was when she opened her palm, licked it and then slid it up and down the base of her silver shadow.
On my knees, I shook with anticipation. Unable to quell the curious desire that was pulsating through my entire body.
Without warning, without false words, without sweet innuendos, she pierced me.
Plunging fast and hard, the cool of her steel dick mixed with the heat of the steam made it hard to breathe.
Nearly suffocating I took her all in.
Thrust after thrust.
Her hands alternating on my ass, in my hair, on my breasts, on my clit.
Euphoria, the only word to describe the climax that rounded out the curves of my back to contortionist standards.
I shook with ecstasy as her crescendo of thrusts slowed down to match mine.
She slid out trailing sweet sticky nectar down my thighs which she greedily lapped up.
From my knees, I slowly turned over on my side. She was already back in her robe.
She smiled at me once before going out.
Her manager walked past with a knowing glance, "Lunch breaks over Jenn".

Bonus Merry HNT

2009-12-25T23:16:00.000-05:00

TMI Award & Lastest ENY Post

2009-12-21T22:38:00.008-05:00

I was a little sick...actually a lotta sick the past few days and missed some really cool posts and didn't get to post a few of my own...

BELATED THANK YOU!!
Thank you so much to Miss Moi over at Kiss The Pen for my TMI Award!!!! Please go check out her blog...it's kissably delicious!! And here is my list of 8 things a voyeur or peeping tom might potentially catch me doing:
1. writing this blog
2. begging my husband for sex
3. taking entirely too long in the shower with my yummy shower head
4. watching porn on my phone while hubby sleeps
5. rocking my baby to sleep
6. fiddling with my pussy hairs
7. poking a fingertip into my ass
8. still begging for some sex though maybe anal this time!

LATEST FILTHY POST ON EROTIC NY
You guys are sooooooo gonna want to read this one!!!
This is what my Erotic NY staff had to say about it:

"Everyone - gay, straight, bi, transgender - should read Black Pearl in her sexiest and funniest blog yet, Penis Envy"

MERRY HNT

2009-12-17T22:11:00.003-05:00

MERRY FILTHY CHRISTMAS!!

Erotic New York Submission #3

2009-12-13T20:58:00.007-05:00

Check out this week's post!! I need ideas for next week! Comment me some filthy ideas...please!

Black Pearl continues this week with, "The Holy Grail of Orgasms", and offers men the secrets to pleasuring women.

The EroticNewYork.com Team

Nocturnal Chat #13

2009-12-07T20:22:00.005-05:00

Working It out - Part One

I thought I was running late for my appointment with the trainer but thankfully she was the one running behind. The gym receptionist told me to warm-up either by taking a walk around the track, riding the bike or elliptical, or stretch until the trainer got there. I opted to warm-up on the bike for a few minutes. I don't know why I made that choice because I usually hate the bike. I can never get comfortable and the seat typically hurts my cooch. Oddly, I was quite comfortable on this particular bike, the seat felt as if it were manufactured just to fit me. I sat up on it real close and pedaled. The friction between the seat and my thighs got my clit to throbbing, so I pedaled faster and faster. I could feel the sweat pooling in my sports bra and I closed my eyes, inhaled, and just when I felt my body start to tense up: my name was called on the P.A. system. Damn. Opened my eyes and went to meet the trainer, but not before I memorized the location of my bike (second row, 5th bike).
The trainer didn't look at all what I expected, over the phone she sounded, well, manly. However, her body was everything I aspired my body to be. She had 10-pack abs, an ass so tight that I silently envisioned trying to stick a finger in without success, toned breasts with these perfectly perky nipples, and her hands (you know I have a thing for hands). Her hands were large (like mine, not freakishly large, but they fit her body), and her nails were manicured with classic white french tips. She introduced herself as Jenn and led me over to the trainer's corner of the gym. Not totally secluded but semi-enclosed. Jenn spent the first few minutes explaining how she was going to work me out with little to no movement which would garnish the desired results.
Our first contact occurred when she asked me to bend at my waist and touch my toes. To show me the correct form she placed on hand on my lower back and the other hand over my abdomen. Her hands were hot but not sweaty. She was close enough for me to smell the cinnamon Altoids she was sucking on.
I shivered.
She asked if I was ok and I played it cool saying I felt a draft. Jenn insisted that she'd get me good and warm in a few minutes. Again, in my head I'm saying, "Yeah, I bet you will".
I shook whatever images out of my mind and focused on my power training. After a half an hour, I was sore and sweaty. "Ready for your cool down? Cuz I'm going to stretch you out".
"Bring it on!" I told her a little bit too enthusiastically.
She had me lay down on my back on the mat and instructed me to lift my right leg. She positioned herself on her knees between my legs with my right leg on her left shoulder. As I pushed, Jenn pushed. First time was brutal, but the second time she was able to get my leg that much closer to me and she let her fingers linger where my thigh branches out to my feminine V. It took my breath away.
"You ok?" She asked.
I nodded my head. Jenn asked me to switch legs and this time her hand rested firmly on my mound with unabashed boldness that made me instantly wet. I'd never been turned on by a woman before and certainly not by a woman in public. The idea of any gym member walking by or another trainer bringing in a client forced me to take a look around. There were dozens of people moving about the gym going about their own daily routines and no one was paying us any mind.
With her hand pressing on my mound, she took her thumb and started to fondle my clit through my sweat pants, all the while my left leg hung on her right shoulder.
"Let me know if I'm hurting you, ok?"
I mumbled an embarrassed, "Um, hm", just as her thumb sunk deeper into my panties. She was pulsing my leg to the rhythm of her hand and I felt myself getting more and more excited. The cum juices were trickling down my backside as she got bolder and bolder, and stuck her thumb in deeper and deeper.
"Just breathe, you're doing fine," she coached me through an orgasm. My eyes were trained on hers, my palms gripping the rubber mat, and my pelvis shifting subtly to meet her probing thumb.
"Hey, Jenn, how's the newbie handling your workout," the gym manager came out of no where leaning over the ledge. From his angle all he would see is my leg on her shoulder, her arm and hand were blocked by her body and my leg.
"She's a trooper, but her muscles are so tight since she hasn't worked out in over a year, you know, new baby and all".
"Why don't you send her down to the sauna? I was just down there and I think there's one open. Let me check."
Jenn began kneading my groin in such a way that it felt as if she were inside of me. I couldn't really enjoy this because she dropped my leg when the manager reappeared with a towel and a key. "Show her where Sauna B is, and here you go, I hope this makes your muscles feel better".
Jenn didn't give me a moment to process what was happening before she led me down the stairs to the locker room across from the saunas. She told me where to lock up my clothes and then I could go into the sauna for as long as I could stand it.
When I came out of the locker sans clothes and just a huge fluffy white towel, Jenn was no where to be found. I let myself into the Sauna B which was small and empty. I switched the sign to say occupied, dropped my towel and laid down on the hot cedar bench. I poured some water onto the coals and let the steam take me away. My hands immediately found their way downtown and tried to reenact Jenn's "training"
I didn't hear her come in. I didn't see her naked body. I didn't realize what was going on until I felt her part my legs and bury her face there...

Get Onboard Erotic NY

2009-12-03T21:45:00.005-05:00

Here are the latest details...and my cumming out announcement...SIGN UP to get weekly updates!

Congratulations to one of our lucky readers!! Please look for our email to let you know that you've won a gift certificate to Disiac Lounge, one of our favorite bars in NYC.

Everyone, please tell all your friends to register at www.EroticNewYork.com to receive our weekly email alerts, so you and your friends can be the first to read about our newest blogs, reviews, and articles.

And, on that note, this week...

It's Cas Marino's funniest and sexiest blog yet! Read "How Do You Like Your Meat? Part Four of Four Parts, exploring the relationships and relations between gay men and their heterosexual counterparts..." at http://www.eroticnewyork.com/cas-marino/how-do-you-like-your-meat

Our newest celebrity blogger, Black Pearl, continues with her steamy thoughts on threesomes at http://www.eroticnewyork.com/black-pearl/can-there-be-happy-ending-after

Date the French way in NYC. Read our review of French Tuesdays at http://www. eroticnewyork.com/dating-in-nyc/french-tuesdays

Is RF Lounge the best new lesbian bar in NYC? Read our review at http://www.eroticnewyork.com/sexy-bars-clubs/rf-lounge

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Find romance in December with sexy restaurants. Read our review of Fig & Olive at http://www.eroticnewyork.com/romantic-restaurants/fig-and-olive

It's a romantic restaurant, but does the food deliver? Read our review of The Park at http://www.eroticnewyork.com/romantic-restaurants/the-park

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Romeo & Juliette at http://www.eroticnewyork.com/beauty-spa/romeo-and-juliette
Ame rican Laser Center at http://www.eroticnewyork.com/beauty-spa/american-laser-center

Don't forget to check out parties for December 31, 2009 - three of NYC's biggest swingers' clubs - DDevious Delights, SinSation and Casbar - are joining forces and members for the hottest sex party on December 31st. For more information, go to our Erotic Calendar December 2009 at http://www.eroticnewyork.com/sex-calendar/erotic-calenda-december-2009

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More to cum (ahem…come) next week!
www.EroticNewYork.com Team

This HNT is Dedicated to My Son...

2009-12-02T23:00:00.004-05:00

The littlest light of my life turned one this week and I am so honored to be his mother.

After a long process to make him, an even longer ordeal to keep him, I still miss the feel of him fluttering away inside of me. There is no greater joy than motherhood, and this week marks his transition from baby to toddler (needless to say I cried like a baby myself).

I chose this HNT because it truly embodies the beauty of being with child.

Happy Birthday Baby, Mama loves you!!